New beginnings
by twilight-the-way
Summary: What if Edward was only human and couldn't save Bella in Port Angeles? What would the future hold for Bella? Could be offending to some people although hopefully not. All human, in character with usual pairings. Now finally complete and being edited!
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer**

I do not own most of the characters in this story. They are the property of Stephanie Meyer. (Twilight *drools*). I also got inspiration from 'Welcome to the real world' by Mk Marie and 'Decision's Fate' by Lemonade Ninja. Both of these are fan fiction stories (Just in case you didn't guess!).

**Authors note**

This story may offend some people, so I am just warning you now.**  
**

**Chapter One: Bella's POV**

I walked down the halls of Forks high randomly thinking about how much I hated my calculus teacher. I had just finished a calculus lesson so I guessed it wasn't that random. I was really looking forward to lunch. I entered the cafeteria and saw Alice, Edward, Jessica, Mike, Angela, Ben and Eric sitting at our table.

It was our first day back for the third quarter of the school year. It wasn't like I hadn't seen anyone during break but it was good to see them again.

I remembered when I used to sit with Edward, Alice and their other adopted siblings. Rosalie, Emmett and Jasper were a year older and they were in college now. The older Cullen siblings must have been scary. Everyone else had avoided Edward and Alice until they left. Conversation was still uneasy but it was there.

I took a seat at the table across from Alice.

"Hey Bella?" Alice said. Her tone sounded like she was playing with an idea. It was probably an idea I wouldn't like.

"Yes, Alice." I replied cautiously.

"You need to go shopping." She said eyeing my clothes. I rolled my eyes. Only Alice would talk about shopping this way.

"No I don't." I replied immediately. I knew where this was going.

"Yes you do. You're going to Port Angeles with me tonight." She said determined, a scowl appearing on her face.

"Alice." Edward warned from where he sat beside me at the lunch table. He didn't want me to be dragged into one of Alice's schemes. I looked to him in thanks.

Edward gave me a smile to show he had received my unspoken thanks and I couldn't help but blush. Edward was indisputably the most beautiful and handsome man on the planet and he liked me. I still couldn't get my head around it.

"Edward, she has to go shopping. I'll hurt your Volvo if you even dream of stopping me." Alice threatened knowing exactly how much Edward loved his Volvo.

"I'll get another one." Edward answered calmly. The Cullen's were rich so he probably could. I knew he loved his Volvo though and the calm was all on the surface. I was overjoyed he didn't give in.

"I'll hurt your Volvo and tell Bella stories from when you were ten." Alice said adding to her threat.

"Urgh, forget it. I'll go. So long as we get dinner and I get to go to a bookstore." I said giving in. Alice always got her way, I should stop giving in so easily but their arguments got out of hand and I hated seeing them argue even if it wasn't serious.

"Yay!" Alice said clapping at her victory. I shook my head. Edward squeezed my hand trying to reassure me. I gave him a tense smile to which he returned a more genuine smile.

I listened to the conversation going on at the rest of the table. The rest of our friends seemed to ignore the conversation preferring to talk amongst each other.

It wasn't long before the bell went and I had to go to class. I got to my locker and checked my schedule. I had biology, which was my only lesson with Edward. At least I could enjoy some part of this day. I grabbed my books and headed to class.

I took a seat next to Edward. It had been the only seat available when I arrived in Forks just over a year ago. Edward and I knew each other a lot better since then.

"You don't have to go shopping just because Alice wants you to." Edward said as I opened my book. The teacher wasn't here yet so we had time to talk.

"Yes I did. I don't want to hear about when you were five." I teased. Edward raised an eyebrow.

"You know I don't." I assured him. Edward laughed.

"So that's the only reason you gave in?" Edward asked dubiously.

"Sure it is. You know Alice she always gets her way. I hate to think of what would've happened if I didn't just go." I said in mock horror.

"I'm sure it would've been terrifying." Edward snorted.

The teacher came in at that point and the conversation had to stop.

I saw Edward scribble something on a piece of paper out of the corner of my eye. I felt a tap on my shoulder and looked down to see what he had written.

I love you B xoxo

I smiled and sent him back a note.

I love you too E xoxo

He told me everyday but I still loved to hear it. To gaze upon the perfection that was Edward and to know he was mine. It gave me satisfaction. My heart swelled in my chest and pumped a ragged rhythm. It always did that when I thought about Edward.

I did manage to learn something that lesson although I'm not sure what. I just hoped Edward was paying more attention than I was. He always did better than me at everything. I wasn't jealous. It just seemed perfectly reasonable someone as beautiful and handsome as Edward would be perfect at everything.

Edward dropped me off at my house to get my purse and then went to take Alice home. He drove both Alice and I to and from school.

I lived with my dad, Charlie; my parents were divorced, so I left him a note saying where I was and whom I was going with. He was the police chief of Forks and I didn't want him to worry. Who knows what he could do.

Once I'd written the note I went upstairs. I grabbed the handbag I hardly ever used and put my purse and phone in it. I took a quick look at my reflection in the mirror and then decided there was no point changing anything now. I went downstairs just in time to hear a honk from the driveway. I knew it would be Alice.

I shut and locked the door behind me and then went to join Alice in her Porsche. Alice had some girly music turned up to what I am sure is max volume. I soon as I shut the door she took of. I buckled my seatbelt. I knew Alice drove crazily fast just like Edward and the other Cullen siblings who had been adopted by Carlisle and Esme. I somehow felt better driving with Edward than Alice.

Alice could barely contain herself the whole way there. She was bouncing in her seat. I knew I shouldn't have given in so easily. I had been on shopping trips with Alice before and knew perfectly well how overboard she went.

She found a parking space and dragged me into the mall. She seemed to find some interesting shops and kept trying to shove clothes on me. I tried to get out of it by saying I couldn't pay for it but she just offered to buy them for me. By the fourth shop I caved. I let her buy me a pair of jeans a shirt. I figured I should get something from going through all this torture.

It was getting late though and I wanted to go to a bookshop. I knew one near here so I told her I would meet her at the restaurant at a certain time. She grudgingly agreed and I went on my way.

I was walked along the footpath humming to myself. I had finally found a way to escape Alice's torture. My victory gave me a high. Along with my victory I got to go to one of my favourite places in the world, a bookshop. It didn't take me long to find the one that I wanted. I often came here when I needed books. The library in Forks had a very limited supply of books.

The bell rang as I stepped into the store. The old lady behind the counter gave me a quick smile and went back to what she was doing. I searched through all the books on display. I didn't know what book I wanted. I searched through the classics. They made up most of my collection at home.

I found a copy of Pride and Prejudice. I had a collection of Jane Austen novels at home but this wasn't one of them. I decided that I would buy it. I continued to search the books now holding the copy of Pride and Prejudice in my hands. I couldn't find any that I liked so I gave in and went to the counter to purchase the book.

The old lady at the counter was extremely helpful. She talked about Jane Austen when she saw my choice. I didn't mind. It was welcome conversation. Anything that kept me out of Alice's tortuous grip.

Eventually the conversation came to an end and I left the bookstore. I briefly thought about which way to go. I was sure the restaurant was the other side of the bookshop. I decided to go that way. It was getting dark but I had my phone on me if I needed to call Alice and ask for directions. I hated my bad sense of direction.

I walked along the footpath thinking of ways to get home earlier. I didn't want to stay out here any longer than necessary. I did however slowly notice that I had left the shopping district of Port Angeles. It looked like I was in an industrial area. There were huge warehouses along the side of the road. I was getting worried. Surely the restaurant wasn't this far out.

I pulled out my phone to call Alice. I gave up when I saw that I didn't have any reception. That would be right. Ah well more time to myself I thought smugly. I was starting too scared by how far out I was though.

I tried to head back. The problem was I didn't know how I got here in the first place. I turned down one street and saw a group of three men loitering around. I didn't want to go near them so I looked for a way out.

"Hey sugar." One of the balls called out. I could tell they were heavily drunk.

I saw a side street and almost bolted for it. I didn't want to go anywhere near those men. They didn't look any older than twenty **(AN: By the way the legal age limit in Australia is 18 so it was really weird writing that as it would be legal in Australia)**. I wondered how they could be drunk.

I tried not to race for the side street in my attempt to avoid them. They would probably notice and try to follow me.

"Don't be like that." Another of the men said as he sae me turn to go down the side street.

I looked at the men. One was tall and lanky with dark hair. The second was an average hight and he looked slightly more muscular with lighter hair. The third was short and with huge muscles and dark hair. He was particularly intimidating.

I didn't pause in my step and continued down the side street. I needed to get away from those men. I turned down another street and saw one of the men appear at the bottom. I went in the same direction they were going so that I could stay away from them. I wondered where the other man had gone.

I turned down a street at the end and hoped the man would stop following me, or that I could get cell phone reception and call Alice.

I had my handbag on my shoulder and I considered surrendering it or using it as a weapon. I wished I'd studied self-defence. I didn't know what I was going to do if they attacked. Something told me that these men were worse than thieves. It was a good thing there was only one now.

I turned round the corner and immediately felt the blood leave my face. The man had wanted me to go this way. There up the other end of the street was the other two men from the group.

"Hey there you are." Called the small yet muscly man past me to the lanky man that had been following me.

"Yeah. Didn't take as long as I thought. Had to take a slight detour though." The lanky man replied. He took a swig from the beer bottle in his hand. They didn't slur their words but I could tell each one of them was heavily drunk.

They came closer and I dropped my handbag to clasp it in my hand. I felt my heart beat race as they came closer. I didn't know what to do. I was trapped. I thought of self defence but I was so clumsy I would probably inflict more pain on myself.

"You shouldn't be walking the streets at night!" The muscly guy continued speaking to the lanky guy behind me.

"You sound like my mother." The guy laughed.

My pulse throbbed in my head. What was I going to do? I pulled my phone out again. I had service. I called Alice. It started ringing and I heard Alice's "Hello?" Before I fell backwards. One of the men had gotten close enough to punch me while I wasn't paying attention.

I fell backward into the taller man and he shoved against me. It had started. The more intimidating man and the light haired man caught me and held me up. I struggled to get out of their hold but they held me tight. The taller man landed a punch in my gut. I collapsed and they let me fall.

"She's useless." The more light haired man laughed. He then smashed his beer bottle on the top of my head. I smelled blood and everything started going blurry. Somehow I managed to hear my phone ring. I tried to find it to answer it but I didn't get very far before two of the men stopped me.

"So who gets her?" I heard the voice of the taller man ask. I tried to free myself from their grip and fight back but I was losing a lot of blood.

"Stop moving. The men are talking." The more intimidating of the bunch ordered and punched me in the face again.

"It's your birthday Mark." The man spoke again but I couldn't see properly now.

"Okay then." The guy who was Mark answered cheerfully.

I felt them rip my clothes and I tried to struggle harder but I was losing consciousness.

I felt the pain though when the now inevitable happened. I heard a blood-curdling scream fill the night. It took me a while to realise that it was mine. I didn't stop. Someone had to come. There had to be someone out there.

I felt a hand slapping my face and some mumbled words. My eyes were becoming long tunnels.

Then I heard a car came through. I wanted to scream for it to help me. I couldn't find my voice. I had lost it after the scream. Two of the men got scared and ran.

I felt two hands grasp the side of my face and for once they didn't slap or punch. I saw a face. It was the face of the taller man, Mark. He had ice blue eyes that were nearly grey now I saw now that I was closer. He had short messy dark hair. I didn't know if that was just because he was drunk or not. I didn't care.

"See you round." He said and he raced off with the others.

The tunnels that made up my eyes were getting smaller. I didn't know if the car had stopped. I was just glad that they had scared off the men. I wanted to reach for my phone but I couldn't find my arms and legs. I just watched as the tunnels grew smaller and smaller.

I knew I lay on the hard concrete but I couldn't feel it. I allowed the blackness to consume me. It didn't obliterate me and for that I was thankful.

I woke up and there were bright lights. I heard Charlie's voice talking to someone. I felt a hand squeeze mine. It was a male's hand and I immediately freed myself from its grip and shrunk away.

"Bella?" Edward's velvet voice asked in concern. I realised the hand was his. That didn't mean I was safe. No men were safe. The pain throughout my body was a reminder of that.

"Where am I?" I asked. I looked over to where I heard Charlie and Edward's voice come from. I could see them now.

"You're in Port Angeles hospital." Edward answered concern on his brow.

"What happened?" I asked remembering clearly my interpretation of the 'incident' but what had happened after that? It had felt like no one would come.

"Alice got a call from you but when it was cut off she heard odd noises and tried ringing you again. When you didn't answer she came looking for you. She figured you had gone to the other side of Port Angeles and had gotten lost. She found you and called the ambulance and Charlie. They said you had severe head trauma and internal bleeding." Edward answered looking to me for confirmation.

"So Alice found me?" I clarified.

"Yes, she heard your scream." Edward nodded still sounding concerned and watching me warily.

How had I ever doubted him? My body remembered the incident too clearly to take his hand confidently but I did take it regretting letting it go. I had probably hurt him and I really needed him right now to remind me that not all men were bad.

"Bella, are you okay?" Charlie asked appearing behind Edward who sat on a chair beside my bed.

"Yes dad. I'm fine." I answered. It was a lie but only a small one. My head throbbed a bit and my 'female parts' were sore but other than that I really was okay.

"Thank goodness. Alice said when she found you that you're clothes had been ripped." Charlie said subtly asking what had happened. I didn't want to talk about it. I could remember the events all too clearly.

"Yeah." I said. Dad patted the back of my hand. I was sure he would've stroked my hair if I hadn't had severe head trauma.

I closed my eyes and Mark's face appeared behind my eyelids. I didn't want to go to sleep. While I was being haunted by the all too recent memory anyway I changed my mind and decided I probably should tell dad. So they could track the guys down.

"One of their names was Mark. He had dark hair and blue eyes." I murmured.

I even remembered his last words to me but I wouldn't let Charlie know that much.

Charlie nodded and wrote it down on a piece of paper beside my bed.

"How many were there?" Edward asked.

"Three." I answered meekly. Edward and Charlie looked to each other and I sighed heavily before speaking again trying to re-find my voice.

"Mark was the only one who… it was his birthday. They were drunk but they didn't look any older than twenty." I said my voice inflectionless. Edward and Charlie both looked disgusted.

"How long have I been in here?" I asked. t felt like I had been sleeping for days.

"It's Thursday." Edward answered. His eyes flicked up to the TV that was on the news.

"Four days ago now local girl Isabella Swan was attacked in Port Angeles." The announcer announced. I guess they didn't have much information yet. I heard Charlie's phone ring.

"They've been calling to see if you're awake. They want more information nosy journalists." Edward frowned.

"You should probably give it to them though if it will help catch them." I said. I didn't really think about it. I didn't want to. I wanted to forget everything. I wished I had gotten Amnesia because it was all I could think about, haunting me.

I looked as the door opened and my mum came through the door. I didn't realise she had come up. I felt really bad now making her leave Phil.

"Mum, what are you doing here?" I asked.

"Honey. You had severe head trauma and internal bleeding. Did you think I would stay in Jacksonville while you were so hurt?" She said. She was obviously happy I was awake. I could hear it in her voice as well as worry.

"How long have you been awake?" Mum asked taking Charlie's place behind Edward. Charlie had gone off to take the phone call.

"Not long. I was just talking to Charlie and Edward about some things." I answered my voice trailing off. I was determined to block the memory of recent events and forget his face as it was imprinted in my head.

Mum looked to Edward who nodded.

"I should call Alice." Edward said leaving his chair and the room to call Alice.

"I was so worried honey. And Charlie says small towns are safer." Mum scoffed taking Edward's seat.

"Yeah." Was all I could say. Mum patted my hand like Charlie. She too was afraid to touch my head.

I talked to mum and a little while later Edward came back in with Alice. I wanted to jump up and hug her but the throbbing in my head told me that it wouldn't be a very good idea to do that. I settled for a very enthusiastic "Alice!" to which Alice smiled and sat on the edge of my bed.

Alice was my absolute saviour so I was overjoyed to see her. Without her who knows what could have happened?

"It's good to see you're better." Alice sighed in relief. She had obviously been very worried about me.

"A very big thanks to you. I heard a car but I blacked out before I could find out if it saw me." I answered.

"I still can't believe I let you go out on your own. It was lucky that I heard your scream. I saw two of them men run but one stayed behind. He looked like he was saying something to you." Alice said.

I nodded reluctantly. I didn't want the others to know but Alice saw it happen it anyway.

"He said 'See you round'." I answered with a sigh. Everyone frowned at that thought. I didn't want to see him round either.

"You looked so hurt. You were curled into a ball. And you're clothes were torn." She said turning to Edward and mum as she finished.

"Yeah, Bella told us what happened. I'll tell you later." Edward answered.

"Okay. I can wait. I am just so glad to see you're okay." Alice gushed happy to hear it later knowing she was saving me pain. Little did she know her efforts were redundant. Everything was a trigger.

**Autor's Note**

If you see any mistakes that I have missed or just wanted to comment on something... Review!**  
**


	2. Chapter 2

**Authors Note**

If you are still reading this story past chapter one... YAY! **  
**

**Chapter Two: Bella's POV**

"Hey Bella's on TV again." Emmett called from the lounge room where the rest of Edward's family was gathered watching TV.

"Emmett." Rose chided. I smiled a small smile. Emmett telling me I was on TV brought back memories that I didn't want to remember. Rose scolding Emmett brought back memories I did want to remember the two clashed.

I was glad Rose, Emmett and Jasper are visiting for the weekend. It was nice to see them. I hadn't seen much of them since they left for college. It felt like some small part of my life was back for normal.

"Sorry Bella. But come on. You're the first person I know who has been on TV." Emmett said acting like a complete five year old and ignoring how uncomfortable he was making everyone, especially me.

Only Emmett would be excited about me being announced as a rape victim on the news. At least they had announced the name and other details of the attacker that I had been able to give. I hated the fact that I only knew something about one of the attackers. I felt sure I would recognise the other two if I saw them but I didn't know their faces as well as Mark's. It was permanently imprinted on my mind.

"You know. I still can't apologise enough for leaving you by yourself on that night." Alice said. I rolled my eyes. Alice had been apologising for the whole three weeks since the incident in Port Angeles. I kept telling her to stop and it wasn't her fault but she wouldn't listen.

"Alice." I said and she knew what I was thinking.

"I know you have a terrible sense of direction. I should never have let you wonder off on your own. Maybe if I was there nothing would've happened." Alice said shaking her head. She wouldn't let me stop her.

"You don't know that. You could've been… attacked too." I said. I still had hesitation over talking about that night and Edward wrapped an arm around my shoulder when he heard my angst. It was so hard to control myself. Purposefully dwelling on those memories was beyond painful and I still wasn't entirely comfortable with Edward's arms around me.

"You think those attackers would've messed with Alice?" She asked raising an eyebrow in an attempt to make me laugh as she saw how distressed I was.

I didn't answer though imagining Alice facing those monsters disguised as men.

"Bella's off the TV now." Emmett moaned interrupting my morose thoughts.

"Good." I replied in a huff.

"You know you should get a check up like Carlisle said. They told you to get one when you were ready in Port Angeles." Edward reminded me. He knew I didn't like talking about it but he was encouraging me to go to the doctors and get screened for STI's (**AN: Sexually transmitted Infection**). I couldn't do that. Not just yet.

"So what course are you doing again?" I asked Rose ignoring Edward.

"Psychology." She answered.

"Oh, yeah." That's why I had been avoiding talking about her course. I remembered now.

"What about you Emmett?" I asked moving on.

"Civil engineering for me." Emmett said with a huge grin.

"That sounds like fun." I said idly imagining Emmett designing some ridiculous building or roadway, whatever they did in civil engineering. For that matter I couldn't imagine Emmett studying.

"What are you going to do again?" I asked. I needed a better picture for my imagination which was having increasing problems with creating its own images instead choosing to dwell on old memories.

"I'm going into designing huge skyscrapers." Emmett said with an even bigger grin.

Now I could I imagine Emmett at the construction site playing with all the tools and distracting the workers. It would certainly be entertaining to watch. I wouldn't like to be the person employing Emmett. Maybe they would have to hire Rose as well to keep him in line.

"What are you thinking of doing?" Emmett asked.

"I'm not one hundred percent sure. I'm definitely going to Dartmouth with Edward. I just have to decide on my course. I think maybe English literature or something."

"That sounds perfect." Rose grinned.

"You're studying medicine, right Edward?" Carlisle asked looking to Edward.

"Yeah." Edward said running a hand through his hair.

"I reckon you would make a great doctor." I beamed at him. Edward ducked his head and mumbled a "Thank you." So quiet that I was barely sure he spoke. Everyone laughed.

"Are you going back to school tomorrow?" Alice asked. She had been very lonely at school. Edward missed me too. I hadn't wanted to go back just yet. Carlisle had said that my head needed time to heal anyway.

"Sure." I decided. I had to go back sometime and Carlisle said I could. Now that I had a taste of normality again I remembered how good it felt and it was easier to push away the bad memories.

"Yay." Alice cheered. Edward just gave me a smile to show how happy he was that I was returning to school.

I spent the rest of the afternoon talking about trivial things with the Cullen's. Charlie didn't mind he had gone fishing. Charlie had asked me a billion times if it was alright for him to go and I just kept telling him to go and have fun. It wasn't until I told him that I was going to the Cullen's that he left.

I didn't want to impose myself on Charlie.

I went home and cooked Charlie's dinner.

Charlie could barely cook bacon and eggs so when I arrived here a year ago I took over cooking duty. I didn't know how he survived before I cooked.

I knew Charlie would complain that I shouldn't be cooking but I felt like it and it wasn't like I was sick or anything. It made things more normal like they used to be and I needed that.

I was finishing up cooking my lasagne when Charlie came through the door smelling the food.

"You didn't have to cook. I could've ordered pizza." Charlie said. I shook my head with a smile.

"We can't always eat pizza dad." I pointed out. Charlie grunted and sat at the table. He could see I was almost done.

"So how are the Cullen's?" Charlie asked.

"They're good. Rose, Em and Jasper are down for the weekend." I said.

"That must be nice. How are they going in college?" Charlie said. I could tell he was trying to make small talk while I cooked dinner. Charlie wasn't a man of many words so this effort was really heart warming.

"They're good. Rose is doing a degree in psychology and Emmett is studying civil engineering. Jasper is studying history." I said.

I had talked to Jasper about his history degree. That was really interesting. He was studying some major events in history. The way he spoke about them had everyone entranced. I could tell he truly cared about what he was studying. Every little detail was exciting to him.

"That sounds good." Charlie said as I put down the plates of lasagne on the table.

It was silent then as we ate.

"I'm just going to read for a bit and then I'll go to bed." I said to Charlie as I finished doing the dishes. I went upstairs and found a good book to read. I lay back on my bed and read. I felt my concentration start to drift and before I knew it I was asleep.

I woke up still fully clothed. I looked at the clock and I was going to be late for school if I didn't hurry up. I got ready as quick as I could. I heard Edward's Volvo pull up outside of the house. I gave it a wave and went back to getting ready for school. I was nearly there. I didn't notice that the Volvo's engine had stopped until there was a knock at the door and I answered it to see Edward standing there.

"You're going to be late." He said with a glance at his watch.

"Will not." I answered as I dashed into the kitchen and grabbed a granola bar. I shoved it in my mouth and grabbed my school bag. Edward stayed at the door and waited for me. He stood aside as I went through and locked the door.

He laughed as he joined me in the Volvo.

"Charlie didn't know I was going to school today." I explained after I took the granola bar out of my mouth. I ate it as Edward drove along the familiar road to school.

"Beside's how can we be late with your driving?" I teased him after I had finished my mouthful of granola bar.

"Easily." Edward said with a smile.

I shook my head. I noticed Alice was very quiet in the back. She usually made her presence known.

"You right Alice?" I asked turning to look at the back. I was worried Alice wasn't there but I saw her sitting in the back.

"Yeah, why?" She asked.

"You haven't spoken. Don't get me wrong. The quiet is nice but I thought you were sick." I teased. Alice pouted and Edward laughed.

Alice returned to normal as we drove closer to the school. I got out of the car and noticed everyone's face's turn to look at me. I hadn't thought of this but it was expected after my prolonged disappearance and well covered story in the news.

"Just ignore them." Alice said as she grabbed my arm to take me to first class. I wished I could ignore them but I couldn't. I could feel their eye's bore into my back and I saw their eye's as they looked at me while I walked down the hall to first class.

It felt like they were judging me and reminded me of that night making me feel dirty and unworthy to be in these halls.

"You okay?" Alice asked.

"I shouldn't be here. I'm not worthy. I feel so dirty." I said avoiding everyone's eyes.

"You have just as much right to be here as they do and you're not dirty. They'll get over it soon and so should you." Alice said with an air of authority.

Who knew it would take them another two weeks to get over it. It had been a whole month since the incident and only now did I not get stare's everywhere I went. I knew it was because I was no longer on the news. I was thankful for that.

Without the stares and the news coverage and all of that it felt like everything was finally truly back to normal and I could get on with my life.

"So, calculus?" Edward enquired looking at my schedule.

"Yep." I answered. I didn't want to go but I knew I had to.

I gave Edward a quick peck on the cheek and then went off to Calculus. I had a sick feeling in my stomach. This lesson was not going to be a very good one.

"Okay everyone take a seat." Mr Varner said as he entered the classroom. I noticed two or three students sitting on desks. They moved to sit on chairs.

I was already seated next to Jess. She wasn't a great friend but at least I knew her.

"Today we are going to start a new unit of work." Mr Varner announced and there were groans from nearly everyone in the class. We barely got the last unit he taught us.

"Today we are going to start working on equations to do with pendulums." He announced holding up a chain with a watch on the end.

"We are going to learn how to calculate distance and time's using this beautiful mechanism. He said swinging the watch back and forth. I felt nauseous. The swinging was making me sick. I knew I was about to throw up.

"Mr Varner. Can I please go to the sick bay?" I asked.

Mr Varner looked confused but allowed me to go. I ran to the office as fast as I could without being sick.

When I got to the office the office lady didn't seem to notice that I looked sick.

"Excuse me but may I please have a bucket?" I asked. She seemed to notice how sick I was then and came back with a bucket. It was just in time for me to throw up into it.

She directed me to sickbay and I sat on the edge of my bed. "Did you want me to call someone to pick you up?" She asked placing a hand on my shoulder.

"I got a ride with a friend this morning. I'm sure he wouldn't mind taking to me to the doctor's. He should know that I'm gone anyway." I answered.

"Okay. Who is this friend?" She asked.

"Edward Cullen." I answered.

The nurse left the room and I thought about how Alice was getting home. Maybe Esme could pick her up. I'm sure Esme wouldn't mind.

"Bella?" Edward said as he entered the room.

"Mr Varner was swinging a watch and it made me nauseous." I explained.

"Do you think it has anything to do with your... injuries?" Edward asked tentatively.

"I don't know. Do you think you could take me to the doctor? I'm sure Esme could pick Alice up." I asked.

Edward nodded and then turned to the office lady. "Do you think we could take the bucket?" He asked. The office lady nodded her head and he grabbed the bucket and helped me outside.

He kept asking me questions as we drove to the hospital. I only needed the doctor but Edward said the hospital would be best. I tried to answer his questions as best I could.

We were sitting in the hospital waiting room and I wasn't paying attention too much so it surprised me when I heard a familiar voice call my name. I should've known that I could've gotten Carlisle as my doctor. He worked at the hospital.

I followed Carlisle into one of the rooms.

"So Bella, what seems to be the problem?" He asked as we all took a seat.

"I'm just feeling a bit nauseous and I threw up." I answered. I was feeling a bit better but it was too late now.

"Okay. I'll have a look at your ears. There might be something there that is making you sick." Carlisle said. He used a special viewer to look at my ears.

"There doesn't seem to be anything wrong. I'll give you this prescription for anti-nausea meds and we'll see if that works." He said writing on a prescription pad.

Edward cleared his throat and we turned to look at him.

"Do you think while she's here you could do those other tests?" Edward asked. I glared at him. Everything was fine and had been for a while now so why did he have to ruin it?

Why was Edward so concerned about those tests? Although I suppose now maybe I had gotten something that made me sick. It would be just my luck.

"We can but it's up to Bella." Carlisle said looking to me.

"I'll have the tests." I said. I wanted to know if I had gotten anything that had made me sick.

"Okay. You'll need to get a blood test and give a urine sample. You can do the tests in the hospital. Just hand the urine sample in to the front desk and I'll see you tomorrow with the results." Carlisle said handing me a prescription, a blood test form and a container for my urine sample. This was going to be fun.

"I'll be there with you for the blood test." Edward said squeezing my hand. I was grateful for that. I hated needles.

"Can you call Esme and ask her to pick up Alice for me please?" Edward asked Carlisle. Carlisle nodded and let us out of the room.

We walked down to where they did blood tests and we passed a toilet. "I'll be right back." I told Edward as I ducked in and filled the container. Rather than carrying it around I took it to the front desk and then headed back to the blood test with Edward.

"It'll be fine." Edward said as we waited for a nurse.

The nurse was really friendly. She was also pretty good. The needle didn't hurt too much and she got it in one try. It seemed like my lucky day. I was wondering why I had put it off for so long.

By the time we were done school was nearly over and it wasn't worth returning so Edward dropped me home. I told him I was fine, which was the truth. I felt much better.

He left and I lay on my bed reading my book from last night until it was time to cook dinner for Charlie.

"How was school?" He asked while we ate dinner.

Ever since I had told him about the stares at school he had asked that question.

"It's fine." I answered. For some reason I didn't want him to know what was has happened today. I knew he would worry and I felt fine now so I didn't want to worry him.

That was about it for dinner conversation. I went upstairs and went to bed. I had the same nightmare again.

It was just a repeat of that night. I always woke up screaming. Charlie had been worried and come running into my room when I first started to have the nightmares. After the first night he learnt not to touch me until I knew that it was him. After a week he knew it was the same dream and he left me alone.

I woke up the next morning feeling nauseous again. It was slightly worse this time. I decided that because I was already going to see Carlisle this afternoon I would just take the day off school.

I heard the Volvo pull up outside the house and I went to tell Edward that I wasn't going to school today.

"I'll drop Alice off and then I'll come back and stay with you." Edward said.

"Sorry Alice." I apologised to Alice who was in the back seat.

"It's okay. You just get better." Alice said a small smile on her face.

I finished breakfast and was just getting comfortable on the couch when I heard a knock at the door. I knew it was Edward I had heard the Volvo.

"Come in Edward. You knew where the spare key is." I called out too lazy to get up.

"How'd you know it was me?" He asked as he came in.

"Because I love you." I answered with a smile.

"I love you too. So you're not feeling any better?" Edward asked breaking the happy mood.

"No." I said scrunching up my nose.

"What were you going to do?" Edward asked.

"Read." I said showing his the book I had in my hands.

"Should've known." He muttered shaking his head in disbelief.

He and Alice loved to tease me that I was a bookworm.

I gave up on the book after I vomited. The sickness lessened after that so I played card games with Edward. Eventually though we had to go to the hospital for the appointment that I had made with Carlisle. I was anxious and nervous to see the results. Part of me didn't want to know but the other part did.

Edward talked about mindless things on the way to the hospital and I talked back. It was easier to talk than think.

I was reading a magazine in the waiting room when Carlisle called my name. I found the time went quicker if you weren't clock watching.

"Okay so let's see your results." He said typing stuff into his computer.

A bunch of text appeared on his screen and he read through it. There was a sharp intake of breath and he read through it again double checking.

"What is it?" I asked.

"You don't have an STI." Carlisle said calmly but I could tell there was more.


	3. Chapter 3

**Author's Note**

So what is the bad news? Let's find out!...

**Chapter Three: Bella's POV**

"And?…" I asked anticipating his answer.

"You're pregnant." Carlisle answered quietly. Instantly I went into denial telling myself that he was lying except that I knew he wasn't.

"You're lying." I yelled before sobbing uncontrollably.

"Bella, please calm down." Carlisle said gently touching my shoulder to calm me down but it had the opposite reaction.

"Don't touch me." I yelled because I couldn't trust any man. That was how this had happened. A man had touched me although I had not wanted it and now I had to deal with this.

My breathing was erratic for a moment and then everything went black.

I could still think and I didn't want to. I remembered that night, everything about it in perfect detail. All the pain from that night and now I had this. I had a part of him growing inside me. I wanted it out. I wanted it gone and forgotten about. Another part of my brain told me that it was a life no matter what and that I couldn't kill it. The two parts of my head screamed at each other neither making sense.

I couldn't do both. I couldn't get rid of it and keep it. My mind attempted again and again to think of ways before it stumbled across the compromising solution. I knew what had to be done.

I would have the baby and then put it up for adoption. It was the only option that I could live with. I hated it but I couldn't take a life I would be worse than… him.

So I would let this piece of the monster grow inside me and then I would let someone else take care of it. Then I would forget about it. I would forget about everything.

There were a few problems though. My college education would be messed up and going through a pregnancy was expensive. I would need to get a job and earn money.

"Bella?" Edward said softly as I opened my eyes.

"I need to get a job." I informed him. It was the latest of my decisions. The words made sense to my delirious and overworked brain.

"Bella, what about?…" Edward said trailing off.

"It's for the baby. I'm going to keep it. Once I've had it then I'll let someone adopt it." I informed them of my decision.

"Are you sure?" Carlisle asked his face tense. I nodded.

"Bella. I want you to go home and think about this okay. It affects your future. It's a big decision." Carlisle said. I nodded. He was right. I knew I had to think about this some more but I also knew I had fought with myself and I couldn't kill the baby. Everyone deserved the chance to live no matter who their father was.

"I'll see you in a month if you stick with your decision." Carlisle said and I let Edward lead me out of the room. I had a lot to think about and I didn't want to be interrupted by having to avoid walls or other objects.

"You want to go home or to your house?" Edward asked.

I needed to be by myself to think so I nodded. I didn't want anyone else affecting my decision. Whatever decision I made had to be mine.

"Did you want me to come in?" Edward asked as he pulled up to my house.

"No thank you." I said and got out of the car.

"I won't tell any of the others." I heard Edward promise before he drove off. I was glad. What if I changed my mind?

I went up to my room to think. I lay on my bed hands on my stomach as I thought about my future. I hadn't thought much of my future but what did I think now? I decided to picture my future the way I wanted it regardless of the baby that had now taken residence in my womb.

I pictured myself going to college. What would I study? I didn't know. I didn't know what I wanted to become. Then I saw it. A kindergarten. It was a safe place full of innocence. It was my escape. Now I had a goal how did I picture myself achieving that goal? I didn't know what I needed to become a kindergarten teacher but I knew whatever it was I would do it. I would find a way.

I decided in a sudden burst of inspiration to go directly to the source. I grabbed my keys and went down to my truck. It had been a homecoming gift from Charlie when I first arrived in Forks and I loved it. It was a big, old, rusty, brown Chevrolet truck. It was loud and the sound surprised me after driving with Edward for so often.

I drove carefully down to the local kindergarten. I sat in my truck for a while thinking of how to ask my questions.

Once I had my script I took a deep breath and got out of the truck. I opened the door and saw Miss Matthews surrounded by a bunch of kindergartners.

"Can I please talk to you?" I asked.

"Sure Bella." She said following me outside.

"What can I help you with? You aren't kindergarten shopping are you?" She asked with a frown.

"Not yet." I mumbled. She didn't hear.

"I was interested in becoming a kindergarten teacher and I was just wondering what qualifications I would need?" I asked.

"Well as soon as you've finished High School I'd be happy to take you. I need another helper around here." She said. (**AN: You need a college education but well this a small town so Miss Matthews knows Bella and so on...**)

"Thank you." I said. It was reassuring to know my dream job was already there, waiting for me. It might be a while after high school that I actually started working though.

I now had the confidence I needed to go through with my decision, for now. I decided I should probably start telling people. Alice hated not knowing what's going on.

I drove to the Cullen's and Carlisle answered the door.

"You're home early." I said in surprise. It felt like five minutes ago that I had just been talking to him in the doctor's office.

"You were my second last patient." He answered in explanation.

"Is everyone here?" I asked anxiously. I kind of wanted to tell them all at the same time, like ripping off a bandaid which also left a mark.

"Yes. Rose, Emmett and Jasper came down early for the weekend. I think they enjoyed the last weekend entirely too much." Carlisle said with a smile motioning for me to come in.

"Could I talk with everyone?" I asked.

"Of course." He answered. He knew what it was about. Edward had obviously told him not to tell anyone else or maybe he just sensed as Edward did that I didn't want that.

"Jasper, Emmett, Edward, Alice, Rose, Esme?" He called their names.

Everyone gathered in the dining room.

There was a throaty cough from Emmett, which sounded loud in the awkward silence.

"I don't know how else to put this. I'm pregnant. I'm going to keep it and then put the baby up for adoption." I said bluntly. Everyone except Edward was shocked. He knew I wouldn't change my decision but he also knew I would stick by my decision and make the best of it.

"Whose?" Esme asked looking to Edward.

"Mark's." I answered my jaw rigid and my eyes fighting tears. I would just have to concentrate on the fact this was my baby too and I would not be worse than it's father by killing it.

"Birthday boy's." Emmett sneered. It was his nickname for Mark ever since he had heard the story. I nodded.

"I'm so sorry Bella." Esme apologised and I looked at her. I don't know what for. It wasn't her fault.

"It's okay. It's not your fault and there's nothing anyone can do about it besides deal with it." I said playing with my nails.

"What about college?" Jasper asked.

"I'm going to work at the local kindergarten. I don't need college." I answered.

Everyone just sat there quietly. No one knew what to say. I didn't know what to say. At least I had told them.

"Hey you could use the baby as DNA to catch birthday boy." Emmett said suddenly his booming voice echoing in the silence.

I hadn't thought of that and now I did it gave me some sort of satisfaction. If they caught him he could never get out of it because of DNA evidence, just one more reason to keep the baby.

'How long would I have to wait?" I asked Carlisle.

"Twenty weeks or four and a half months.

"That long." Emmett moaned.

I wanted to thump him. Someone should. I was very pleased when Rose did the honour of whacking him over the head.

Rose then proceeded to pull Emmett up the stairs before he could say anything else.

"I'll talk to you later." Alice said as she left the table dragging Jasper behind her.

"So are you sure about your decision?" Carlisle asked.

"Yes I thought about it." I answered.

"Okay, if you're sure." Carlisle said raising an eyebrow and checking. I nodded.

"You're a very strong woman." Esme said embracing me in a hug.

When we stepped back Edward took my hand and we went upstairs to Alice.

"You have got to let me help you with everything. If you think you're getting out of a baby shower you're wrong." Alice said as soon as I joined her on her bed. How could she be excited about this?

The way I saw it I wasn't killing the baby and it should be thankful for that. I had no love for it.

"Alice." I moaned.

"I understand that this is the demon baby from hell but its exciting okay. You don't have to do a thing. You don't even have to enjoy yourself." Alice said with an encouraging smile.

"But Alice did you seriously want to have a baby shower for a rape baby?" I asked. Alice was beyond mental.

"It's a baby. They're special no matter what so I don't want to hear you refer to your baby as a 'rape baby' ever again." Alice warned narrowing her eyes.

"I give in. It's too much effort. But if the whole school somehow finds out you are gone Alice, gone." I said glaring at her to emphasise my words.

Alice let out a huff but she didn't argue.

"So are you going to tell Charlie?" She asked.

"I was just going to wait till I got big and have him ask." I shrugged. I didn't want to tell my dad. Telling the Cullen's was hard enough.

Telling people meant things weren't normal and all I wanted was for things to be normal.

"I'll help you." Edward said.

"Thank you. But what if my dad make's the same assumption as Esme. She knew everything that had happened and still made the assumption." I sighed. Charlie would probably be even more likely to make that assumption than Esme had been.

"It's okay. We'll set him straight." Edward said with my favourite crooked grin. I was immediately lost in his beauty. My brain turned to mush. I shook it to clear it. I felt my heartbeat return.

"You're going to have to stop doing that to me you know." I scolded him.

"What?" He asked innocently.

"Dazzling me. We've been over this before. You know how it affects me and it's probably not very good for the baby. I haven't killed it so far and I'd like it to stay that way though I don't know why." I huffed.

Edward rolled his eyes. He still didn't realise the effect he had on me.

I knew he was about to argue when Carlisle poked his head through the door.

"Bella. Did you want a note for school to get out of going to school in the morning? It can't be the best for you." Carlisle asked concerned.

"Yeah. That would be good. I'll also need a note for PE." I said.

"Bella." Carlisle said a parental tone colouring his voice.

"You know me. I'll probably end up having a really bad injury of some sort. It's a wonder I've survived the last eleven years of PE." I argued.

"Okay." Carlisle agreed with a laugh.

"How are you going to get to school?" Edward asked concerned.

"I have a car." I said pointedly.

"I don't think so." Edward said shaking his head.

"Are you doubting my ability to drive or my car's ability to work?" I asked indignant. I knew he didn't like my car. He said so every time he was forced to drive it. He hated the internal speed limit and just general oldness of my truck. He kept convincing me to let him buy me a new Audi but I wouldn't let him.

"I doubt my ability to let you drive." Edward said crossing his hands across his chest.

"Just because I have a rape baby in my womb you doubt my ability to drive?" I asked looking to Alice and daring her to object to my reference of 'rape baby'. I had said it just to annoy her. She didn't object, simply rolling her eyes, so I turned back to Edward raising an eyebrow.

"What if something happened?" Edward asked his voice pleading.

"Fine then we'll do it your way. I'll catch the bus." I said thinking of the bus stop down the road from my house.

"Bella." Edward protested.

"It's either I drive or catch the bus. Choose." I crossed my arms.

He was about to protest so I kissed him before he had the chance to speak. I loved him so much and it was hard to argue with him. I'd been thinking about his lips the whole time.

"No chance, you're catching the bus." Edward said smiling my favourite crooked smile as we pulled away from the kiss and making me groan. He was impossible.

"I better get home and cook dinner. Do you think I can manage that?" I asked sarcastically looking to Edward.

"For now." He answered too seriously. I decided I'd deal with that when it came.

I went home and started dinner. I was working myself up to tell Charlie something I knew wouldn't happen, at least not tonight.

"Hey Bella." Charlie called as he came in.

I finished dinner and went upstairs to bed. I got settled in bed and read a book. It wasn't long before I fell asleep.

I woke up late the next morning and was promptly sick. I was glad Charlie was at work already. I hadn't even told him that I had been sick.

I took my time getting ready. I had a note from Carlisle and I didn't have to go to school until second class. I had done my research at the Cullen's (they had a faster computer) and I knew what bus to catch.

I walked down to the bus stop and waited. I didn't have to wait for as long as I thought for the bus to come. I got on and took a seat on one of the seats that faced towards the centre of the bus. I looked vacantly across the bus and it took me a while to realise what I was seeing. The woman who sat across from me was pregnant.

I was staring quite intently forgetting everything around me. She caught my gaze and cleared her throat. "Sorry." I mumbled looking away.

"It's okay. I get that a lot although never so intently." She said curiously.

"Sorry it's just that I'm... too." I said stuttering over the word.

"How old are you?" She asked.

"Eighteen." I answered.

"That's young." She said her forehead creasing.

"I was raped." I whispered not quite sure why I was telling her this. I don't know why it was so easy for me to talk to this woman.

"Me too." She said pain apparent on her face.

I was very surprised. It was a small town. What are the chances of having two women pregnant let alone raped in a town as small as Forks? I really had to tell me dad so he would change his views on small towns being better than big cities.

"Did you live here before?" I asked. I wondered if she had moved here after for safety.

"No. I lived in Chicago." She answered.

"I was visiting Port Angeles but I was living in Forks before." I said.

"What's your name?" She asked.

"Bella." I answered.

"As in Isabella Swan?" She asked.

"Yeah." I said she had obviously watched the news.

"What's your name?" I asked.

"Charlotte." She answered.

"Have they caught the guy?" in asked.

"Not yet, you?" She asked.

"No. It was only a month ago though." I said. I had to keep my hopes up. I couldn't allow myself to lose hope. I now had my DNA evidence. I had helped provide the police with a drawing. I had also given a name. I had done everything I could.

""This is my stop." I realised as I looked out the window.

"See you." Charlotte waved as I got off the bus.

I felt a bit of a high as I stepped off the bus and into school. It was good to know that I wasn't alone. I hoped she would be on the bus tomorrow. I wanted to talk to her more.

"You look happy." Edward said as he met me in second class, which was biology.

"I met a girl on the bus." I said cheerfully as I took a seat.

"That's nice." Edward said sincerely but sarcastically.

"She was raped and she's pregnant." I explained.

"Oh." Edward said. He could see why I had connected with the girl so easily now. I blushed at the connection he has no doubt made.

"Did you just blush?" Edward asked in disbelief.

"You know I blush easily." I mumbled.

"You haven't blushed since... that night" Edward said hesitantly.

"Huh." I sighed as I realised how true that was and the reason behind it. I couldn't believe that. I knew my happiness had everything to do with meeting Charlotte and knowing in some form that everything was going to be okay.

I thought about her as I went through my day and all through the night. I wanted to talk to her.

The time went fast and before I knew it I was on the bus again. I could feel my face light up when I saw Charlotte sitting on the bus. She seemed happy to see me too.

"When do you catch the bus?" I asked.

"I catch it every weekday to get to work." She said tilting her head to the side as she thought about something.

"I catch it every weekday to get to school." I said with a smile.

"School?" She asked looking at her watch.

"I got a note from my doctor so that I can go to school late. That way I don't have morning sickness at school." I said wrinkling my nose.

"I could see how that would be helpful." She laughed.

"How far along are you?" I asked. I didn't have a clue how big I was going to get or how quick.

"Five months." She answered. I looked at her my eyes widening. Her bump was in no way small.

"It's okay. I'm told that I'm pretty big.' She said her laughter increasing.

"Can you please tell me more about what I have to look forward too? When I talk to you I feel like everything's going to work out." I pleaded.

She shook her head but it wasn't to say she wouldn't help me just to show amusement in my pleading.

"How far along are you?" She asked.

"One month." I answered.

"Everyone's different so I'll tell you my version. One month along was when I got morning sickness. In about two weeks it progressed to all day nausea and morning sickness. That's when different and strange foods caught my attention. At two months I developed a strong connection with cheese and I heard my baby's heartbeat. At three months my clothes became very tight and I finally got rid of the nausea. At just past three months I gave in and brought maternity pants but not shirts. At four and a half months I needed maternity shirts but it was okay because I felt my beautiful girl move and then I got the test done to find the DNA of the rapist and I found out I was having a beautiful girl." Charlotte concluded with a smile.

"So many questionss. I'll go in order." I decided. Charlotte just smiled shaking her head in amusement.

"Define different foods?" I asked.

"Tuna, cream and soup." She said very seriously. I held back my laughter.

"Cheese?" I asked in amused disbelief.

"Cheese." She replied simply nodding.

"Three months of nausea?" I asked almost begging for her to admit she had lied.

"Two because it doesn't start until the end of your first month." She said sympathetically.

"Do you think I could feel her move?" I asked.

Charlotte nodded and I put my hand nervously on her bump.

I felt a movement and everything changed. It felt like an electric current ran through my hand shocking me. I instantly pulled my hand away. Everything became very real even more real than before. There was a baby in there. There was a baby in me and its father was a monster.

I slumped back against the chair.

"You okay?" She asked.

"I'm too young. I can't be a mother. I barely know what I want to do when I leave school. I'm still in school. I don't even want it. How? How do I do this? I can't. I haven't even told dad. I haven't told mum. I don't even know what to expect or do during pregnancy… Ha, I'm pregnant." I rambled gurgling at the end. My hand flew to my stomach and I wanted to pull it out. I wanted to vomit.

"Stop the bus." Charlotte called.

Charlotte led me off the bus. I shouldn't be doing this I didn't know where I was. I didn't care. I was pregnant. I was eighteen. I felt like I needed to vomit. I realised too late nothing was stopping me. Despite Charlotte's best efforts I slumped to the ground.

"You'll be okay. You can get out of this. You're only one month along." Charlotte said rubbing my back. I wiped my mouth on my sleeve.

"I'm pregnant." I whispered.

"Bella. It's going to be okay." Charlotte said soothingly. I nodded. I had thought about all of this before. I knew I was pregnant. Why was this suddenly a big shock for me?

"Why'd you keep yours?" I asked.

"Because it's not its father. It's part of you. It's a life. You can't just destroy that." She replied with certainty.

"I can't destroy it either but I don't want it. I don't know what to do. Putting it up for adoption seems the best option." I said thinking of all the conversations I'd had with myself over this.

"You're strong you can do it. I've told you about my pregnancy that should help. You can talk to your doctor and there are plenty of books. You should also tell your parents. They will help you." Charlotte said remembering my frantic rant from earlier.

"Thank you." I said trying to at least give her a smile. The best I could do is a grimace. She patted my back.

"Are you right to get to school. I'll have to wait a while until the next bus comes anyway if you want me to help you get to school." She said handing me my bag. I looked around and noticed we were at my stop. I couldn't believe I had missed it.

"Sure. There's someone I'd like you to meet." I said thinking of Edward.

"Who?" She asked looking into my eyes.

"The man who I wish was the father of my babies." I said wistfully. Charlotte laughed and I led her into the school.

"Hey Bella. Why are you walking around and talking to a pregnant woman?" Jess asked when she saw me. I wasn't usually violent, especially after not so recent events but I really wanted to punch her in the face.

"Charlotte was raped. It wasn't her choice." I said defending Charlotte.

"Why are you talking to a raped pregnant women?" Jess asked like it was the stupidest thing in the world to be doing. I couldn't help what burst out of me next. Oh God, I was going to have to tell Charlie and tonight.

"You are too." I said and stormed off dragging Charlotte behind me.

"Friend?" Charlotte asked doubtfully.

"She was." I said after a moment of pretend thought.

"You're late." Edward said when we caught up with him.

"I had an attack of reality this morning. You should try it its refreshing. This is Charlotte." I said introducing Charlotte to Edward.

"Hi, I'm Edward. Bella talked about you a lot yesterday." Edward said shaking Charlotte's hand.

"I'm sure she'll have even more to talk about today." Charlotte said with a grin.

"I should actually go, I'm sorry Bella. I would think after all the problem's I've caused you today that you would want nothing to do with me so I'll consider myself lucky if I see you tomorrow." She said cheerfully as she gave us a wave and left.

"Don't worry about it. I'm okay." I called back after her.

"What problems?" Edward asked raising an eyebrow.

"I felt her baby move and then I had a panic attack. That's what I was talking about when I mentioned an 'attack of reality' earlier. Then I accidentally blurted out that I was pregnant to Jess when Jess was annoying me about talking to Charlotte." I said in a rush.

"We'll talk more about this later. I'll see you at lunch." Edward said worried.

I looked at my schedule and groaned. I had Calculus first up. That meant Jess. What had I done?

I took a seat as far away from Jess as possible. I saw her whisper something to Lauren. Then before I knew it the whole class was whispering and staring at me.

I walked to lunch and knew I would have to face stares. I had been brave enough to stay at the table with Jess before but I couldn't do that now so I sat at my own table.

"Since when did we sit here?" Alice asked as she joined me at the table.

"Since I told Jess about the rape baby." I answered. I only ever referred to my baby as a rape baby around Alice because I knew how much it annoyed her. Alice grumbled under her breath.

"I'm only letting you get away with that while you're stomach's flat. As soon as you have the bump your baby shall no longer be referred to as 'rape baby'." Alice said calmly but threateningly.

"Alice lay off. It's not your baby." Edward said as he joined us. He knew I had told Jess so he didn't question my choice in table or the fact that we were openly discussing my baby.

I looked at the assortment of food on my tray. I wasn't really hiding anything now so I had felt free to just take what I felt like. I was going to get a job to pay for it. I would have to work on that this afternoon along with telling Charlie.

It was a few minutes later when a shy cough interrupted our lunch.

"Can I join you?" Angela asked,

I liked Angela she was nice. She even looked nice. She had long dark hair and soft concerned eyes. She was tall with pastel coloured clothes and glasses.

"Sure." I said.

I knew she'd ask questions but it was better than assuming like everyone else and she wouldn't spread the word like gossip.

"Don't kick me off the table but is it true?" Angela asked quietly.

"Depends on what story Jess has concocted." I shrugged.

"She says that you're pregnant and it's from that night that was on the news." Angela said looking at the floor.

"That's true." I answered.

"I'm sorry." Angela apologised. Why did everyone do that? Albeit the fact that I had only told the Cullen's and Angela.

"It's not your fault. You can't change what happened." I assured her.

"So you're going to keep it?" Angela asked confusion in her eyes.

"Yes. I can't take a life. I would be worse than him." I replied shuddering at the memory.

This baby was going to be a constant reminder so I would just have to get used to it along with the fact that my normal life was over.

"Yeah, I suppose." Angela agreed.

The rest of lunch was quiet except for Alice's head, which I am sure, was full of lavish plans. I'd have to get Edward's help to put a stop to them all.


	4. Chapter 4

**Author's Note**

Here we get a bit of time lapse to get to the interesting points. Sorry if it confuses you at all!

**Chapter Four: Bella's POV**

"You are so not going to eat that." Rosalie said taking a disgusted look at my sandwich.

"She will. I saw her eat one before." Edward said equally disgusted and disbelieving as he shook his head. I poked my tongue out at my audience. Alice, Jasper and Emmett were watching as well.

"Not even I would eat that." Emmett laughed watching as I took a bite.

"You'd love it. It tastes like heaven." I sighed after taking a bite. I was just passed one and half months now and I was beginning to forget what food was normal. I was kind of getting used to the whole pregnancy thing too. It felt normal and I could deal with it.

"I didn't think heaven tasted like shit!" Emmett exclaimed before he burst out laughing.

"It doesn't." I complained trying to make them see my point of view.

"What's so amusing?" Carlisle asked as he came through the door. He had just returned home from work.

"Bella likes cream, cheese, pickles and tomato on her sandwich." Emmett explained amongst laughter.

"Bella you should eat better." Carlisle said with a frown.

"If this is what it wants that's got to be good for it, right?" I asked. A smile crept onto the corners of Carlisle's mouth and he shook his head.

"You should tell your dad. How are you going to explain your weird diet, vomiting _and_ stop someone telling him congratulations?" Edward asked pointedly.

The odds were stacked against me and it was a miracle he hadn't found out yet. Mom would probably call soon so I'd have to tell her.

"I'll try and tell him tonight." I said trying to summon up some courage to tell Charlie.

"I'm coming with you to make sure you do." Edward said crossing his arms across his chest daring me to argue. I didn't. I'd been putting it off for long enough.

"Actually we should probably go home now. You got home late." I said looking at my watch and then Carlisle.

"Sorry there was an emergency and then I made a short detour trip on the way home. I had to pick up something from the pharmacy for you." He said handing me a bottle of pills. I looked at the label and they were prenatal vitamins. I really was going to have to tell Charlie.

"Okay let's go." I said dragging a very surprised Edward out the door.

Since Edward wasn't allowing me to drive he had picked me up and driven me here so cars weren't a problem. We hopped into his Volvo and he drove down to Charlie's.

I heard a phone ringing inside and Charlie wasn't home yet so I unlocked the door as quick as I could to answer it.

"Hello?" I said as soon as I picked up the phone.

"Hey honey what took you so long?" Mum asked on the other end of the line.

"I just got back from Edward's." I replied.

"Oh. So how was your day?" She asked.

"Ah mum I have something to tell you and I want you to remember back to one and a half months ago." I said trying to make sure she would remain calm.

"Okay." She answered her voice laced with curiosity.

"I'm pregnant. It's from that night. I'm going to have the baby and then put it up for adoption." I said calmly hoping mum would stay calm too.

"Oh honey. Did you want me to come down? Does Charlie know? What about school and college?" She asked going into mother mode.

"I don't need college. I'm going to become a kindergarten teacher. I already have it planned. School's doing okay for now. I come a bit later but I have a note from Carlisle. I'm also going to get a job to pay for all my food and stuff. Charlie doesn't know but Edward's going to make sure I tell him tonight. I'll be okay you don't have to come down." I said answering all of her questions.

"We're happy to help you honey. We'll pay for any food or medical expenses. It's good to know Edward will be there for you. I'll come down for the birth. I want to be there. When are you due?" Mum asked.

'Ummm… I haven't had the chance to ask Carlisle but you know when it was conceived." I answered.

"Hmmm… Tell me next time I call you. I wish I were there. You can't be feeling well." Mum sympathised.

"I'm okay. So long as I don't do anything too out there I'm okay. Mornings are hell though until I'm on the bus. There's another woman who catches my bus that was, attacked. She's pregnant too. She's been really helpful." I said.

It was easy speaking to mum and not having to hide in my own home. Mum told me a few tips that were worth a try.

By the time the conversation was done it was dark outside and Charlie was due home any minute.

I searched the kitchen for the recipe from Grandma Swan that Charlie liked so much. I needed something to soften him up first. I was so anxious. Edward kept reminding me that I had nothing to be afraid of but I didn't believe him.

I was halfway through cooking the recipe when Charlie came home.

"Hey Bella." Charlie said as he hung his jacket on the door.

"Hey dad. Have fun today?" I asked. He had been out fishing because of the weekend (Hence why Rose, Em and Jasper were home).

"Yeah. Didn't catch anything though." He grumbled.

"Dinner smells good." He commented, as he smelled what I was cooking. I shrugged. The sandwich I had at the Cullen's was more appetising.

"You staying for dinner?" Charlie asked when he saw Edward. Charlie didn't mind Edward too much so long as he didn't stay too late.

"Depends." Edward said looking to me.

"Yeah, he is." I said.

I served dinner, which Edward stayed for. I was washing the dishes while Charlie and Edward sat at the table. It was a very awkward scenario. Perfect opportunity I thought.

"I just wish we had some DNA evidence on the guys that attacked you that night." Charlie said breaking the silence. I didn't even want to know the train of thought that had led him to say that sentence.

"We do but only for one." I sighed taking the perfect God given opportunity.

"What do you mean? Bells, you aren't?…" Charlie asked trailing off.

"I'm pregnant." I said quietly.

"You aren't going to keep it though. I mean you haven't even had morning sickness yet." Charlie stammered.

"I've had morning sickness for just over two weeks. I was just working up to telling you. I'm going to have it and put it up for adoption." I said. Charlie's face turned red.

"Bells. What about College? Are you sure this is what you want?" Charlie asked almost pleading.

"Yes, I've thought about it." I answered simply rather than go into detail.

Charlie's face returned back to its normal colour but he didn't look happy.

"If it's what you want. I guess I'll support your decision." Charlie sighed.

"Thank you dad." I said.

"Can Edward stay the night? It's late and it's Sunday tomorrow." I asked not expecting much.

"You just told me you're pregnant and then you ask if you could have a boy sleep over?" Charlie asked incredulously.

"One, the pregnancy isn't my choice and two because of the pregnancy you can be damn sure nothing will happen." I argued.

"Fine, but if I hear anything, anything at all, you're out." Charlie said shooting a look at Edward.

"Promise." I said solemnly before taking Edward's hand and going up the stairs.

"I'll be right down here." Charlie warned. I ignored him.

"Wait here, I'll be right back." I said as I sat Edward on the edge of my bed.

When I came back from the bathroom I saw Edward reading my book.

"I never really got this book before." He said as he heard me enter the room.

"Hmmm…" I murmured.

"I called Carlisle and Esme." He said as I got under the covers.

"Hmmm…" I murmured again.

Edward got under the covers and took off his pants leaving his boxers. He wrapped his arm around my waist and I bit my lip hesitantly as I knew I needed to tell him something that would probably send him running.

"Ever since that night I've had nightmares. You probably shouldn't touch me when I wake up. Just let me know you're there by talking first." I said.

"Okay." Edward said calmly and agreeably. I guess he figured it could be worse. He knew what the nightmares were about.

I listened to him hum a soothing melody and I fell asleep quickly. I had no nightmare that night. Knowing Edward's arms were around me protecting me and hearing his beautiful humming kept them away. I had my first night of peaceful sleep.

Too bad that when I woke in the morning the first thing I did was run straight to the toilet.

I felt a set of hands pulling my hair back as I threw up in the toilet.

"And what was your plan for today?" Edward asked sarcastically.

"It'll be gone in an hour or so. Then I'm going to go job searching." I said after I felt a bit better and I was sure I wasn't going to vomit.

It took longer than I expected to be ready to go job hunting. I was looking out the window when I saw Newton's outfitters. Mike's parents owned it. I didn't like Mike, he used to follow me around like a lost puppy until I made it very clear that Edward and I are an item and that he didn't have a chance in hell of ever being with me. I didn't mind his parent's though so I told Edward to pull over.

"I'll try here." I said indicating the shop. Edward pulled over and we got out.

I saw Mrs Newton standing behind the counter. She didn't look like the sort of person you would expect to work here. She had a floral dress, heels; bleach blonde hair, whitened teeth and manicured nails.

"Hi, Mrs Newton." I said as I came up to the counter.

"Hello Bella. How can I help you?" She asked.

"I was looking for a job actually." I replied fiddling with the hem of my shirt.

Edward was looking at some product in one of the aisles. His family often went camping. They had a lot of supplies.

"We'd love to have your help." Mrs Newton said enthusiastically.

"There's just one thing." I said wondering if the hem of my shirt would rip.

"I've heard the rumours. Can't believe it's true. We can discuss maternity leave in a few months." Mrs Newton said warmly.

"Thank you." I said looking into Mrs Newton in sincere thanks.

"You're a very brave girl for going through with it." Mrs Newton said encouragingly.

"When did you want me?" I asked.

"Just on the weekend and after school on Thursday." Mrs Newton decided.

"Okay. I'll see you on Thursday." I said.

"See you Bella." Mrs Newton said as I went over to Edward.

"I have a job." I announced brightly.

"And with time to spare." Edward cheered.

"Did you want to go back to my house? I think Rosalie was enjoying watching you entertain Emmett." Edward laughed.

"Sure. We wouldn't want to deprive Emmett of anything would we now?" I answered sarcastically rolling my eyes.

Edward drove back to the Cullen's and we came in just in time for lunch. I thought I could keep it down so I tried some. It was really nice. It needed some cream on it but other than that it was fine. Esme just shook her head when I made the suggestion. Carlisle was just happy that I was eating right.

Carlisle also asked whether I was taking the prenatal vitamins. I told him I had taken them but that I had probably vomited them up. He suggested that I take them at night. I told him I had been a bit busy and preoccupied with telling Charlie. They were glad that he finally knew. I also said that I had told mum.

Speaking of mum reminded me of the question that I had to ask Carlisle. He said I was due September 20th.

It was good to talk about something different than Mark. I didn't even think of him, almost.

There was this small part in the back of my head that constantly wondered where he was and what he was doing. It always worried me. I couldn't help but wonder what a despicable creature like that did by day. Part of the baby was him too so I wondered about him often.

After speaking with Charlotte I was very intrigued about my two-month check up. I didn't know if I wanted to hear this baby's heartbeat or see the baby. Charlotte wasn't going to be catching the bus for much longer; she was going on maternity leave. I exchanged numbers with her so that I could call her and invite her to the baby shower if Alice was still planning one. It seemed inevitable like most of Alice's plans.

"It'll be okay." Edward encouraged as I sat in the waiting room breathing deeply. It was like I was already in labour, urgh labour.

"Bella." Carlisle called motioning for us to follow him into the room. I saw the ultrasound machine.

I remembered what happened when I felt Charlotte's baby move. What if that happened today? I had been doing so well and I couldn't let Edward see me like that. I knew today would definitely make it more real that I could see and hear the baby inside me.

"Any questions or concerns?" Carlisle asked.

"Ummm... How do I go about adopting?" I asked.

"Just fill out this form. I'll send it off and someone will get in contact with you." Carlisle said handing me a sheet of paper.

Carlisle and Edward waited patiently as I filled out all my details. I didn't know how to fill in some of the details on the father. Carlisle told me he would deal with that for me later. I handed back the form.

"Okay, if there's nothing else. I'll get you to lie up here for me." Carlisle said motioning to the bed.

I lay on the bed and pulled my shirt up.

"This is going to be cold." Carlisle warned as he put icky gel stuff on my stomach. I took a deep breath and felt my heartbeat accelerate.

Carlisle placed the Doppler on my stomach and I heard a strong thudding beat that was my heart.

"It's okay Bella." Carlisle said as he heard my accelerated heartbeat. I couldn't be calmed down not now.

"Okay here we are." Carlisle said positioning the Doppler.

I looked at the screen and saw a tiny whitish grey fleck amongst the black. That was it. That was my baby. I wanted to cry. It was real. It was there. It was mine. It was so small.

"And the heartbeat." Carlisle said adjusting some dials and we heard a faster softer beat.

I couldn't hate it. How could anyone hate something that small? Its tiny heartbeat thudded rhythmically.

"Are you alright Bella?" Carlisle asked when I didn't say anything.

"I'm fine." I said and I was.

I was still going to put it up for adoption though. I was sure I couldn't handle being a mother especially to a kid that would remind me every day of that monster.

"Okay. Here you go." Carlisle said handing me a bunch of tissues to wipe the gel of my stomach. He hung the Doppler back on the machine and I wiped off my stomach.

"I'll see you again in another month." Carlisle said and I went out to the front desk to make the appointment.

The jeans wouldn't fit me. I was sure they had fit me the other day but maybe I had been wrong. I tried the zipper and groaned again in frustration. These were my more comfortable jeans. The other ones had definitely stopped fitting me a couple of days ago.

I glared down at my unobtrusive stomach. You wouldn't even know I was pregnant, at three months, but I couldn't fit my damn jeans.

I gave up and found a pair of old sweats. I knew what I had to do now and I knew I was not going to like it one bit. I was going to have to ask Rosalie and Alice to take me shopping. I was on my way to the Cullen's anyway.

"Yes, yes, yes!" Alice exclaimed clapping her hands and jumping up and down like a crazy person.

"Limits Alice." I said trying to get her back under control.

"Only jeans and four pair's maximum. If you take me to a maternity clothes shop I will have to kill you." I said when she ignored me.

"You're no fun." She pouted coming back to her senses.

"Neither are you." I laughed.

My good mood was probably due to the fact that I hadn't been vomiting or nauseous for a couple of days now.

We were taking Rosalie's convertible and we went only to the local shopping centre. I didn't know if I could ever return to Port Angeles.

"What about these?" Rosalie asked holding up a pair of jeans.

"They're nice." Alice said giving them her seal of approval.

"Fine." I said grabbing them.

I'd gone up two sizes and was trying to find a pair that fit me lengthwise as well as around the waist. It was very frustrating.

I tried them on and to my pleasant surprise they fit perfectly and they made the fourth pair. I could get out of this torture.

"They fit. Let's go." I announced as I came out of the changing rooms. Alice frowned and I could tell she was about to argue.

"Don't even think about it." I warned before she even had the chance to open her mouth. I went up to the register and paid for the jeans. Rosalie and Alice offered to pay for me but I wouldn't let them. I had my job at Newton's outfitters anyway.

After we left the store Rosalie drove us back to the house and we sat around talking some more. I still hadn't gotten a reply back from the adoption agency yet and I was getting worried the others kept assuring me everything was going to be okay except for Alice who had plans to set up a permanent nursery.

I told Carlisle and Esme not to let her near the spare room while I wasn't there to guard it myself. They laughed but agreed.

I got increasingly anxious, as the weather got warmer and warmer. Now that I was feeling better in the morning I was going to school on time again and Edward was picking me up and driving me there as usual. It had been Charlotte's last bus trip too.

I was starting to show and the weather was getting warmer. That would be just my luck. I wouldn't be able to hide behind huge sweaters. Eventually my news jeans stopped fitting me and I gave in and let Alice buy me some maternity pants. I hid them behind huge sweaters as well but I didn't know how long I could keep that up.

It got worse when my bump started pushing against the cotton in my shirts. I knew all this was inevitable but it was finally here.

Exams came and I didn't know if I could do this. I had one month of school left. Surely, I could make it. I worked hard and tried to keep a balance, which wasn't as hard as I had thought. I kept up with everything. I was pretty smart or so I'd been told which probably helped me keep up.

It still worried me though. Under my sweater I was wearing a shirt that accentuated the bump. There wasn't a shirt that didn't nowadays. And I was sweltering in the sweater. I only had a few more weeks of this to go. I could make it I encouraged myself.

"Bella, just take of the sweater." Alice said completely unsympathetic as I complained.

"You're probably warmer than everyone else anyway." Alice added. She was right. Whenever I was with the Cullen's I felt the heat more than they did.

"Fine but you're standing in front of me." I whimpered.

"No, I'm not." Alice said defiantly shaking her head.

I debated with myself. I was boiling. It was right near the end of spring. Surely I wasn't as big as I thought I was. Was I brave enough to do it? A part of my mind just wanted to rip the sweater off and the other part wanted me to run away and hide. Why did I always seem to have to completely different sides in my head? Right, because I was a wuss.

"Damn you Alice." I hissed under my breath as I pulled of the sweater. I felt a lot cooler but I could see people staring already. We were at lunch. I watched as the people that had seen me take off my sweater pointed and told their friends. I felt like biting their fingers off.

"It's rude to point." Alice called out to the people that were pointing. They withdrew their fingers but the whispers kept up. I wished I could thank Alice but I didn't really owe her much at this point. She owed me.

"You look beautiful." Edward promised rubbing his hand across my back.

"Thank you." I said as I looked down at my obvious baby bump. Why did people care so much?

I gave Edward a kiss on the cheek to show my appreciation.

Things didn't get easier during the last two weeks of school. I still got stares. I wanted to just run and hide but I knew that wasn't possible. I needed to find a way to get through the last two weeks.

It didn't help that Edward and Alice were going off to college. I wanted to go with them just for something to do. I knew I'd have a job but I would be all alone, or potentially with a newborn baby the way the adoption process was going.

I concentrated on the fact that I was closer to getting the paternity test to keep my mind from the dark thoughts surrounding college and school.

The paternity test gave me some small hope, which was really good at this moment in time.


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter Five: Bella's POV**

Charlie had made me promise to let him drive me to graduation so I'd given in. I thought Edward should spend the night with his parent's. We were driving in the cruiser, which I didn't love, but I let Charlie carry out the fatherly duties that he felt necessary.

"Here we are." He said as he pulled into the crowded parking lot.

He found a park and we walked in. I was glad that I had the gown to cover me not that there wasn't anyone who didn't know anyway.

Once we got in I was pulled away from Charlie to get in line with the rest of the student's waiting to get their certificate.

"Over here Bella." Jess called waving me over. Why was she talking to me? I hadn't spoken to her in days.

Her last name was Stanley so I had to stand behind her. This was going to be interesting.

"Hey Bella. Isn't this exciting? I can't believe this is it. We've finished high school. I'm going to miss everyone. Aren't you?" Jess asked all jittery. Now I understood her mood better.

She was going all nostalgic with the whole end of high school thing. I hadn't really had a chance to get nostalgic with my mind so consumed with other things.

"I know. I'm going to miss everyone too." I lied.

The only people I would miss were Alice and Edward and I would hopefully see them, a lot. Then I thought of Angela and I knew I'd miss her. I'd have to get Alice to invite her to the baby shower as well. It was good to know I had _some_ real friends.

I watched as the ceremony started and the line preceded across the stage each person taking their certificate once their name was called. It was now my turn. I walked up took my certificate and shook the principal's hand.

I heard loud applause and saw mum and dad standing up and applauding me. I gave them a smile before I joined the rest of the students on the other side of the podium.

Not long after everyone had his or her certificate. The principal spoke some words and everyone threw their graduation caps in the air. I was a bit late but I'm sure no one would notice.

We all dispersed and I went to find mum and dad. I went to where I'd seen them in the back of the crowd.

"I didn't know you were here." I said when I saw mum.

"It was a surprise. That and I had to see you graduate." She said embracing me in a hug.

"Well you haven't been lying over the phone." Mum said taking a step back after she felt the bump that my stomach had mutated into.

"Nope." I sighed.

"I love you so much Honey." She said wrapping an arm around my waist as we looked for Charlie.

"Hey Bells." Charlie said when we caught up to him outside of the gym where the ceremony was being held.

"Hey dad." I greeted him.

"We were going to go to the lodge for dinner. Want to come?" I asked.

"Sure I do." Mum said. I was glad. Getting her and Charlie together wasn't always easy.

Charlie drove me down to the lodge and mum met us there in her car.

The lodge was the most fancy and expensive in Forks and it looked pack full of students and their families celebrating graduation. We managed to find a seat in between the Newton's and the Weber's. I was glad we were near Angela's family and not Jess'.

There was much debate over my order but eventually I was allowed to order a burger and fries with a side of cream. Charlie talked to Mike and Angela's parents as well while we ate. Mum and I didn't mind. We had our own conversation.

"So I hear Alice is determined to throw you a baby shower?" She hinted.

"Yes, she is and yes you're invited." I said knowing what mum wanted.

The night went fast and I didn't know if it was because I had finished high school or because mum was here or I was having my twenty-week appointment tomorrow. I decided that it was all three.

When I went to sleep I had the nightmare. It was worse tonight for some reason. Everything felt more real. I could more vividly feel, see and hear every sensation. Mark's parting words echoed in my head when I woke up with a start.

I felt a sort of twitch inside my stomach. It took me moment to realise that it was a kick from inside my womb. I gasped. The baby had moved I felt it.

Ever since that two-month ultrasound I had marvelled at my baby unable to hate it. It didn't matter who its father was. Charlotte was right. It was mine too and it was a life. A life connected to mine. I was carrying a living being inside of me. I rested my hands on the bump to try and feel it from the outside but I couldn't.

"Mum, dad. I felt it move." I said as I came down the stairs to mum who was lying on the couch and dad who was making coffee in the kitchen.

"That's wonderful." Mum smiled as I sat beside her.

"I also have my twenty week appointment today." I said excitedly as I went back up the stairs to get ready.

I got ready really quickly and I was sitting around anxiously as I waited for Edward to arrive. He was still insisting on driving me everywhere. The way I looked at it he may as well be the father. I wished he were.

"I thought I was picking up Bella. What are you doing here Alice? I didn't know you were pregnant." Edward teased as I bounced in my seat.

"I felt the baby move." I exclaimed in a burst of excitement.

"Oh, Bella that's wonderful." Edward congratulated me as he started the car.

"I'm also excited about the twenty week appointment." I added as he pulled out of the driveway and drove towards the hospital.

Edward just laughed as I sat bouncing on my chair in the waiting room.

"Bella." Carlisle called and we followed him into the room.

"So any news?" Carlisle asked before he started.

"I felt it move this morning." I said excitedly.

"Oh yes, it is about that time. If I had seen you sooner I would have told you what to look for." Carlisle said writing in my file.

"Okay, let's see, Today we will do the paternity test. We'll also do an ultrasound and find out the gender of this beautiful baby." Carlisle said.

"I'll need you up here." Carlisle said indicating the chair with the stirrups that was in the corner of the room.

Oh no, this is what I had feared. I dreaded that chair. It was just so humiliating and degrading. I had to do it though, especially if I wanted to be certain of catching Mark. I went behind the curtain that surrounded the bed as I changed into the hospital robes Carlisle had handed me.

When I came out I saw that Edward looked uncomfortable and I realised he didn't know where he should be. I did feel sorry for him but I felt sorrier for myself.

"You can stand beside me and hold my hand." I said as I walked slowly over to the chair.

I placed my feet in the stirrups and Carlisle walked over with a long plastic object. I didn't want to know the details so I shut my eyes.

"Okay, here we go Bella." Carlisle said and I felt it. I thought of something else, anything, while he did the test.

"All done. Now for the good bit." Carlisle said and I got down from the chair. I'd have to get changed again so I did.

"Okay here comes the cold jelly." Carlisle said as he squeezed some of the icky gel stuff onto my stomach again.

Carlisle moved the Doppler around getting all the information he wanted. When he was done he handed me a few tissues and I wiped the gel off.

"So is everything okay?" I asked.

"Yep all ten fingers and all ten toes." Carlisle said writing in my file.

"And the gender?" I asked.

"What gender did you want?" Carlisle asked.

I hadn't thought about it that much because it wasn't like I was keeping it. I wanted to know though. I decided if I had to choose I would want it to be a girl so that it wouldn't look a thing like its father.

"A girl." I said.

"Well then congratulations." Carlisle said with a smile.

I couldn't believe it. I was having a little girl. She would be nothing like her father I knew it. I was so happy I was euphoric. Something had finally gone my way.

"What names did you have in mind?" Carlisle asked.

"I didn't have any. I don't know." I said still in a bit of daze.

"I have an idea for a name. You don't have to use it if you don't want though." Edward said. I'd sort of forgotten he was there.

"What is it?" I asked.

"How about Marie?" Edward suggested.

"It's beautiful." I agreed.

"Then it's settled. A beautiful girl named Marie." Carlisle said cheerfully.

I left the hospital feeling a lot happier than I had in a very long time. I couldn't wait to tell everyone else. I thought about keeping this new information from Alice but I knew that was more trouble that it was worth.

"So, what did you find out?" Alice demanded as she opened the door.

"We're going to tell everyone at once." I said and stepped past her into the dining room. Everyone was already waiting. They knew how Alice was.

"We're going to have a beautiful girl named Marie." I announced.

There was a huge cheer from Emmett and Alice. Everyone else was very happy but they managed to contain themselves.

"So you decided to name it without me did you?" Alice asked when the excitement wore off.

"Edward suggested it and I liked the name. It's my middle name and it's similar to your real first name." I said nonchalantly.

"You're right. It's a beautiful name but still. You decided the name without me." Alice whined.

"We are capable of organising our own lives. You don't have to make every decision for us. I won't intercede and try and name your baby for you." I argued. Out of the corner of my eye I saw Jasper turn green.

"Speaking of decisions, you realise Edward. Bella is no longer a virgin and you are." Emmett pointed out amongst groans from everyone.

"Emmett, my pregnancy has nothing to do with decisions." I growled sick of reminding of him of this. Rosalie thumped him on the head and took him out of the room telling him to stay there and went back in to talk to us.

"It's okay. Emmett's just being immature." I said trying to console him. I knew him well enough to know he didn't care about his virginity. All he cared about was Emmett teasing me about things he shouldn't and setting me off.

Edward didn't say anything so I tried again.

"I'm fine. I don't sit there remembering that night but it's always there regardless of whether Emmett brings it up. You know what I was thinking about before. What if he gained custody of Marie? See, it's always there. Until they find him. Even then, I don't know what will happen." I said trying to reassure him.

"I didn't know. I wish I could make it better. I wish you hadn't had to go through what happened that night." Edward said.

"I love you and nothing will ever change that." I said kissing him on the lips. My mind full of Edward's face with no room for anything else.

I could've spent the rest of the afternoon kissing Edward but my stomach had other ideas.

"Baby's hungry." I murmured as I pulled out of the kiss.

"Well let's feed her." Edward smiled offering me his hand and leading me into the kitchen.

Edward was a good cook but he didn't use cream so I had to add some to the meal when it was done. I could live like this forever but unfortunately life has other plans.

After I'd eaten I went home. Mum was there and I didn't remember to ask her how long she was going to stay for.

I came home and I saw mum and Charlie watching the news. I knew why the instant I heard the story that the news was reporting.

"And for those of you following the Port Angeles rape case from the 15th of January involving Isabella Swan and an attacker with the first name Mark the latest news is that they have DNA evidence." The announcer announced before moving on to the next story.

"You didn't." I said looking to dad.

"We have to scare the hell out of these people." Charlie said unashamed.

"I suppose you're right." I sighed taking a seat on the couch.

"So how was your appointment?" Mum asked.

"It was great. Edward came up with a name for the baby." I said proud of Edward's name. I really liked it.

"That's great Honey what is it?" Mum asked.

"Marie." I answered.

"So it's a girl?" Mum asked. I nodded.

"Oh Bella, congratulations. I'm so happy for you." Mum said wrapping her arms around me in a hug.

I must have fallen asleep deep in thought. A rumbling in my stomach woke me up and told me to eat. The lights were out and it was the middle of the night. I couldn't see mum so I assumed she had gone upstairs to sleep in my bed.

I fixed myself a snack and went back to the couch. I don't know how I had fallen asleep before the couch was so comfortable.

When I woke the next morning it was Charlie waking me up gently.

"Come on Bella, wake up." Charlie said lightly shaking me.

"What is it?" I asked sleepily.

Charlie never woke me up without a good reason like school or work.

"It's the adoption agency. They've found someone. They're coming over in an hour." Charlie said.

"Oh my God." I said wide-awake now.

I ran upstairs to get into some decent clothes. Thanks to Alice's overzealous shopping habits I had quite a few maternity clothes now. I'd have to actually thank her later. I hadn't even thought about this. I'd thought about putting the baby up for adoption but meeting with the adoption agency and potential parents wasn't something I'd really thought about.

I came back down showered, hair brushed and with a nice outfit on. I had felt hungry so I didn't bother brushing my teeth. I was halfway through bacon and eggs when there was a knock at the door. Charlie went to answer it. I heard a 'come in' and footsteps walk into the lounge room. I looked longingly at my bacon and eggs before joining Charlie in the lounge room.

"Hi." I said as I saw the couple and the lady from the adoption agency sitting on the couch.

"You must be Isabella." The lady from the adoption agency said warmly as I sat beside Charlie.

"Bella." I corrected.

"I'm Debbie." She said shaking my hand.

"I'm Mark and this is my wife Janine." The man said introducing himself and his wife. I felt my body stiffen and tense. No matter how much better I was about the events of last night I still wasn't good with that name.

He looked nothing like the other Mark. He had long but neat dark hair and warm green eyes although nowhere near as beautiful as Edward's. He looked older than the other Mark but not by much.

"Is she okay?" I heard Debbie ask Charlie worriedly. Mark and Janine looked at each other nervously.

"Mark was the name of her attacker." Charlie explained holding my hand.

"What's your last name?" Charlie asked Mark.

"Hills." Mark replied shaking a thought out of his head.

"I'm sorry Mr Hills. It's not your fault." Charlie said.

"He has blue eyes. Yours are green." I commented lamely it was the least I could do to let him know everything was okay. They'd only just met me and I had scared them away.

"I'm very sorry." Mr Hills (I just can't think of him as sharing that name) replied.

"Everyone says that and I don't know why. It's not their fault." I said with a smile. I was over it now. The name had just shocked me.

"Have they caught the attacker?" Debbie asked.

"No. Not yet." I answered. I hated thinking like that, that there was no hope. There was always hope, there had to be.

"Uh, okay. So you filled out this sheet just over two and a half months ago. Is there any new information we should know?" Debbie asked turning professional.

I looked at the sheet she placed in front of me.

"We know the gender now. It's a girl. I'm also obviously a bit further along than two months and we also have a name. That is if you don't mind." I said looking up to Janine and… Mr Hill.

"Not at all." Janine said reassuringly.

"Okay. It's Marie Charlotte." I said. Edward hadn't said anything about Charlotte but I wanted something to remember her by. She had been so helpful to me. Debbie wrote down the new information.

"I hope you don't mind but you know how it is with adoptions, sometimes they fall through. We also have another woman lined up. I hope it's okay." Janine said concerned.

"No that's okay." I promised. I was worried though and I tried not to let it show.

I thought about what I was going to do if they didn't adopt Marie. I would have to make sure I was able to take care of her for a while at least. Alice would be pleased. I tried not to think of that.

"If you'll sign here please Bella." Debbie said laying a document out on the table. I read through it as did Charlie and then signed on the lines that Debbie pointed too.

"You probably won't hear from us until after the birth. I hope everything works out." Debbie said leaving the house.

"Is it okay if we contact you? I'll leave you our number as well." Mr Hill said handing me a business card. I walked over to the phone and scribbled down my number on the message pad and handed that to them.

"Thank you." He said as he took the number and left.

"Well that went well." I said exhaling as I plopped back on the couch.

"Bells, I think you need to be ready to take care of the baby even for a little while. What if they adopt the other baby?" Charlie said concerned.

"I know. I'm going to have to go shopping with Alice." I said wrinkling me nose.

"Okay. You're a good girl Bells. I'm sure you'd make an excellent mother." Charlie said as he went to join me on the couch.

"Before you sit down could you please pass me the phone? I need to call Edward and Alice." I asked.

Charlie gave me the phone as he took a seat on the couch.

"Hello." Alice answered the phone.

"Hey Alice. I have exciting news, for you anyway. Why don't you and Edward come over and we can talk about it?" I said.

"Okay. We'll be right round." Alice said before hanging up.

I didn't have to wait long before Edward and Alice knocked on the door.

"Hey guys. Guess what? The adoption agency came round. They found a set of parent's." I said excitedly.

"That's great Bella. What are their names?" Alice asked. I should've known the inevitable question.

"Janine and Mr Hill." I answered hesitantly.

"Oh." Alice said when she realised.

**Author's note**

Yay! It's a beautiful girl and she has a set of parent's ready to adopt her, pity about the name (sorry guys I couldn't resist!). Next chapter will be FULL of suspense ;) Hit that review button!


	6. Chapter 6

**Author's Note**

Here we go. Bella's shopping! What else could happen?... ;P

**Chapter Six: Bella's POV**

"Come on Bella. You'll need this too. There is no way you are leaving this store without getting this." Alice said as she held up a car seat.

"I don't plan on taking care of the baby for that long Alice." I protested.

"You have to get the baby home from hospital." Alice disagreed.

I contemplated my chances of winning this argument along with the logical reason that Alice had given. I gave in to a very happy Alice. She had already forced me to get a crib and change table.

Now I knew why I had waited so long to go shopping with Alice. I was now five and a half months pregnant and really irritable.

I had thought we might just be shopping for diapers and clothes but apparently not. Alice was trying to get me to buy bottles and baby plates and cutlery. I had to remind her that, one, I wasn't going to keep Marie for that long, two, they were for older baby's not newborns and three, I was going to breastfeed. Edward had looked uncomfortable when I mentioned that but I didn't care if it stopped Alice.

I went up to the counter and I now had an assortment of items. I had a crib, change table, pram, car seat, blankets, outfits, diapers and dummies. I obviously wasn't carrying the bigger stuff but Alice had memorised the ordering code so that we could order them.

"Hey, so like how many months are you?" The man behind the counter drawled. He was young with long ash-blonde hair. He looked like a hippy.

"I'm not pregnant this is for my friend." I said looking to Alice very seriously. Alice shook her head indicating that she wasn't pregnant.

"Dude, I don't think you're girlfriend knows she's carrying your baby." The guy said to Edward.

"She's not." Edward said simply playing along.

"You're friend's are whacked." He said to Alice who just shook her head.

"I'm five and a half months." I said to the guy and he slowly nodded.

"Awesome." He said.

Edward payed for all the stuff after much protesting from me and we left the store. The change table, crib and pram were coming in about two weeks.

Edward helped me carry the stuff up to my room while Alice stayed downstairs talking to Charlie.

"There we go." Edward said as he placed the bag at the end of my bed. I sat on the rocking chair with a hand on my bump, very cliché.

"So you think I could feel it?" Edward asked hesitantly walking over to where I sat.

"Sure, she's not moving much now though." I shrugged.

Edward placed his hand on my bump and I could feel the baby move. I saw a grin on Edward's face and I knew he felt it move too.

I couldn't remember the last time Edward had touched me so tentatively. He always he told me he loved me and I knew it. I loved him. I wanted him. I wanted him to kiss me.

"Kiss me." I demanded breathlessly. Edward's head snapped up to look at me. He hadn't kissed me since that night sensing that it might not be a wise choice. I don't what he saw now but he kissed me and it wasn't gentle. I was just as wrapped up in the kiss as he was. I had forgotten to breathe but I didn't care. I loved Edward and he loved me. I was kissing the most beautiful creature in the world.

"I've been thinking. What if you kept Marie? I would stay with you and help you. I want to live my life with you and I would love it if Marie was a part of that." Edward said as we pulled away from the kiss.

I was shocked. I hadn't been expecting this. I didn't know if I could do that. I wasn't ready to be a mum even with help. I wanted kids but in the future and with Edward.

"I don't know Edward. What about college?" I said biting my lip. What I was really thinking about though was whether or not I could live my life with Marie.

"Carlisle has a friend on the board. Since I've already been accepted they will extend that invitation for another year. I can stay with you and then when Marie is old enough you can come with me to college.

I didn't know what to say to that.

"I'm going put off college for a year no matter what but I would appreciate you giving my offer some thought. You don't have to answer now. I understand." Edward said calmly and serenely. I could tell he was hurt though.

I heard the phone ring but I hoped Charlie would answer. I just kept staring into Edward's eyes. The phone stopped ringing and I heard Charlie talking to someone on the other end.

Edward and I just looked into each other's eyes until Charlie called my name up the stairs. I sighed and went downstairs to see what it was.

"They found him. He walked right up to a police station in Sequim and handed himself in. His name is Mark Ambrose" Charlie said dumbfounded.

"What? Are they holding a trial?" I asked.

"Yeah in a few days. They have to do DNA testing but they're pretty sure he's the guy." Charlie said shaking his head in disbelief.

A few days seemed like a very long time. I couldn't believe it was only two weeks though as I sat in the courtroom. I watched as he came in. He was the man from that night and my nightmare's all right. He was just as I remembered him, like I could forget him.

The sight of him made me bite my lip so hard that tears flowed from my eyes or maybe it was just the situation. I was in the same room as the man who had attacked me.

They had already made me swear on the bible before he came in and they told me I could remain seated.

He swore on the bible and took his seat in the stand. It was certainly him. It was the face that haunted my dreams turning them into nightmares. He looked at me in confusion obviously contemplating something. It was interesting because now that he wasn't drunk he wasn't as scary and I wasn't really crying out of fear. It was the pain of the memories. There was no way he wouldn't be scary to me after what I had been through but I could see the difference.

"We will now hear the prosecutor's view of the event." The judge said turning to me.

"It was late at night and I was walking around Port Angeles trying to find my friend. I came across this man and two of his friends." I said my voice strong despite the tears.

"They were heavily drunk. One of the men punched me in the face and I was shoved into another. They held me while he punched me in the stomach." I said my voice cracking as I thought of what was now in my stomach. This man in front of me was him, the man responsible for everything.

"One of the men then smashed his beer bottle over my head. I received another punch in the face as I continued to struggle. They held me down while he... raped me." I said the tears flowing freely now and my voice weak and blubbery.

"Before they left they slapped me in the face." I said gathering myself as I remembered wanting to give every detail.

I watched, as Mark looked disgusted. What for? I thought. Why did he care now? Didn't he like hearing what he did to me? He thought it was painful for him. My thoughts became bitter and sarcastic.

"Thank you Miss Swan." The judge said with a crisp nod.

"Do you deny these claims?" The judge asked looking to Mark.

"I..." Mark trailed off looking confused.

I wanted to hurt him. I wanted to jump over the desk walk right up to the witness stand and punch his face in. How could he talk about something like this in that way?

"I need a yes or no Mr Ambrose." The judge said losing patience.

"No. I don't deny the claims." Mark gulped looking at me and I could see recognition is his eyes.

"Thank you Mr Ambrose. Considering the DNA evidence against you I sentence you to thirteen years jail with no parole." The judge said and she brought the hammer down.

I felt a weird sense of complete euphoria. Against all odds he was behind bars. He was going in jail with no chance of ever getting out. It was a relief. I watched as they took him away. He didn't look surprised but he did look scared and confused. I didn't care. He was gone. I didn't have to worry about him.

The Cullen's and mum and Charlie were all in the court and jumped for joy at the news. We cried and hugged when we met each other again outside the courtroom.

A week later I came home and the change table, crib and pram were waiting for me. I called Edward and he brought Jasper and Emmett over to help him.

"So have you thought about my offer?" Edward asked as we sat in my room two weeks later.

"I don't know Edward. I'm getting about four hours sleep a night." I sighed.

"But you have thought about it." Edward asked.

"Yes but I still need more time. It's a big decision." I sighed.

The phone rang and I answered it. I was very surprised that Charlie hadn't beaten me to it. At six months pregnant I wasn't the fastest person in the house.

"Hello?" I answered.

"You have a call from Port Angeles correctional facility. Do you accept?" A robotic voice asked me.

I didn't know anyone in prison, unless it was… I don't know why but I decided to take it. I guessed it was because I could always just hang up but I think it was more like temporary insanity.

"Yes." I answered hesitantly.

There was a click as the call transferred.

"Hello? Is this Isabella Swan?" The voice on the other end asked cautiously. I knew that voice. It haunted me in my nightmares.

"Yes." I answered holding back tears. Damn hormones, I wanted to yell. Well I wanted to yell the phrase out loud but I also just wanted to yell in general. I wanted to be angry.

"I wasn't sure you'd answer. I really want to talk to you. Could you please visit me? I'll understand if you don't want to or can't." Mark said still very cautious.

"I don't know maybe." I said and I hung up.

I couldn't talk to him on the phone. How could I talk to him in person? Why had I even said that last sentence? It was reassuring to know that there was nothing he could do if I didn't show up.

I went back to Edward still in slight shock. I mustn't have looked too well either.

"Bella, are you okay?" Edward asked when he saw me.

"It was him. He wants me to visit." I whispered.

"You don't have to. It's okay." Edward soothed.

It never escaped my mind over the next few days. One morning I woke up completely angry at my lack of sleep. It surprised me seeing how scared I had been for the last couple of days. I didn't care I would take it. Anger was better than being scared.

The baby's kicking had woken me up and I wanted to kick something. I decided that since I had the perfect emotion for it I might as well go and visit the lovely Marie's father.

I grabbed the keys to my truck and drove to Port Angeles correctional facility. I looked at my watch when I got there. 4:30am. Perfect.

"I'm here to see Mark Ambrose." I told the guard at the entrance.

"Sorry but no visitor's are allowed at this time in the morning." The guard said looking bored and tired.

"I'm sorry but I'm six months pregnant. My baby woke me up at four o'clock in the morning. If you don't let me in there to kick the father's arse I'm going to kick yours." I yelled at the guard.

"Okay. Follow me." The guard said waking up with a start.

"Sit here and I'll bring him in." The guard said and I took a seat at one of the table's. The place was empty. Everyone besides the guards in here was asleep.

The guard came back with a half asleep Mark. His eyes widened when they saw me and I felt vindictive satisfaction as he saw the consequences of actions. It felt good being the one in control this time.

"When?" He asked looking at my bump.

"Four o'clock in the morning. That's when she woke me up this morning and that is why I'm here talking to you at four thirty. I thought you deserved to enjoy absolutely everything about your daughter." I said as he took a seat.

"I, I…" Mark stuttered.

"Is that all you can see because it seems like it. You wanted to see me?" I asked raising an eyebrow.

"I wanted to say sorry, I know it's completely ridiculous, especially now." Mark said indicating my bump, "But I wanted you to know that I'm not always like that."

"You don't get it do you. Do you have any idea what I have to live with now as a consequence of your actions? This baby is only half of it. I can't sleep a full night anyway because I have nightmares and sometimes when I remember that night all too well my boyfriend can't go near me. We have only kissed once in the last six months." I yelled wanting him to understand the extent of the damage he had caused.

"I didn't even know until I saw it on the news one and a half months ago." Mark stammered taken aback by my anger.

"What took you so long to hand yourself in?" I sneered.

"There was a high probability that I would end up in jail. I was throwing my life away for guilt." Mark said pitifully, ashamed as he should be.

"I'm throwing my life away and I didn't even get a choice. I'm stuck with this." I said indignantly pointing at my bump.

"Please don't be offended but why didn't you get an abortion? I'm just curious. I thought most women in your situation got an abortion." He asked quietly. He still didn't get it.

"Because I can't take a life. That would make me worse than you." I spat.

"How did you know my name?" Mark asked suddenly.

"I also know your birthday. You sure you wanna know how?" I asked vehemently tilting to my head to the side as I watched Mark's reaction. I wanted to see him squirm. I wanted him to fear me.

"Yes." Mark swallowed.

"One of your friend's said 'It's your birthday Mark' when you were deciding who got to have me." I hissed in disgust and I didn't burst into tears as I talked about the events that night. Right now he was in front of me in handcuffs and I was in control. It was my turn. I was still uncontrollably angry but I couldn't count on this to last forever.

Mark winced and I felt vindictive satisfaction.

"You want to know what you said as you ran off into the night leaving me for dead?" I asked not caring about his answer. "See you round." I laughed. "You said 'See you round'. And now every night in my nightmare I hear 'See you round'." I said moving into hysterics now.

"Who was in the group?" He asked looking away as he finally grasped what he had put through. His face was tight with pain.

"There was a short muscly man with dark hair and a lean man of average hight with light hair." I answered for once not yelling or angry.

Mark didn't say anything but I knew that he knew who they were.

"You want me to track them down for you. Maybe they can keep you company." I suggested casually.

"Would you turn in one of your friends?" He asked looking me in the eyes then instantly looking away.

"Would you rape someone?" I asked tilting my head to the side and watching as he flinched.

"How old are you?" I asked morbidly curious.

"Eighteen." He answered. I laughed. I hadn't even been right with guess of twenty. He wasn't any older than I was. "It's good to know that at least if I miss my opportunity at college you do too." I said happily.

Mark was interrupted by a loud cry of 'Holy fucking shit' making him flinch.

"Who's that?" I asked raising an eyebrow liking anyone that Mark hated or was afraid of.

"My cellmate." Mark muttered.

"You didn't tell me you had a girlfriend or that you were a father." The cellmate said elbowing Mark in the ribs.

His cellmate was your stereotypical inmate. He was forty with greying hair a beard and a big gut.

"I'm not his girlfriend." I hissed at the cellmate. There was no way I was letting him think I would willingly be intimate with this guy.

"You're not his family cause you really don't seem to like him..." The cellmate said thinking it through.

"Well fuck. Little Mark is a rapist." The cellmate exclaimed. "Who would have thought? No wonder you didn't tell us." The cellmate nudged Mark again.

"Go away." Mark muttered.

"I'll see you round. If you do find some way to escape though let me know." The cellmate laughed as he went off to annoy someone else.

"I'm going to go. Charlie will probably wonder where I am." I decided. I'd done what I needed to here.

I got up off the seat but I didn't get far. I felt a hand on my arm and my body tensed automatically turning around.

"Please don't go." Mark pleaded.

"Get your hands off of me." I said through gritted teeth, "Before I tear them off."

"I'm sorry." Mark said removing his hands.

"Do you think I could?…" Mark said eyeing my bump.

At first the idea of him touching my baby, I wouldn't allow myself to think of it as his, I was immediately enraged. He didn't have the right but then I realised that maybe it could teach him a lesson.

"Maybe you should get a feel for what you've done. You can think about it in your cell while you sit there and rot." I said turning back to him.

He hesitantly reached out hand and placed it on my bump. My skin had goose bumps on it from where he touched it but I didn't care. I wanted him to realise just what he'd done. He frowned in deep thought as his hand lay on my bump.

"Does she have a name?" Mark asked.

"Marie Charlotte Swan until the adoption papers go through." I answered.

"What are the couple like?" Mark asked looking up at me.

"I've only met them once. Their names are Janine and Mark. I'm assuming he's the good Mark." I said pursing my lips wishing it was the other Mark I had met in the street that night.

"I used to think I was too." Mark mumbled to himself taking his hands off the bump.

"See you round." I said as I left. He knew I wouldn't, that I was only repeating the last words he had spoken to me. I hoped they had the same effect on him as they did me.

"I'm ready to go." I told the guard who was waiting at the door. He led me out and I got back in my car and drove home a million thoughts running through me head.

I couldn't drive anymore as the inevitable tears flowed from my eyes. The anger was all used up and my mind finally processed that I had been in the same room as the monster and he had touched me. More than that, I had let him.

I pulled up on the side of the road and called for Edward to come and pick me up. He sounded disapproving when I told him where I was.

"Oh, Bella. You shouldn't have gone." Edward sighed pulling me into his chest when he arrived at the truck. I didn't answer. I couldn't. The sobs racked my body making speaking impossible.

"It's okay. He can't hurt you." Edward crooned stroking my hair. I would've nodded except I couldn't move my body.

We just sat there for a while until Edward helped me into the Volvo.

'He didn't even know until the news reported the new DNA evidence." I said in disbelief. It was the first thing I had said. Edward didn't reply. He didn't know what to say.

"I think he was more scared of me than I was of him." I said laughing humorously wiping away the tears and trying to get my confidence back.

"You're pretty scary Bella." Edward teased. I sighed. I wanted to think about something else.

"Baby shower tomorrow." Edward said cheerfully as a distraction.

"Don't remind me please." I laughed more genuinely.

"If I don't Alice will." Edward laughed now.

"How are we getting the truck home?" I asked.

"Alice is driving it behind us now." Edward sad confused at how I could have missed the fact that Alice had been with us.

"Oh." I said looking back and sure enough Alice was following us in the truck. I mustn't have seen her through my tears. I should've heard her though. I didn't really mind.


	7. Chapter 7

**Author's note**

To all you Mark haters out there I am sorry but I really wanted to do this. Most of this chapter is not new... I am sorry! But is Mark's POV on certain events.**  
**

**Chapter Seven: Mark's POV**

A guy named Mark had raped a girl named Isabella Swan on the 15th of January in Port Angeles. The picture looked just like me but it couldn't be. It just couldn't be. If I told myself that everything would work out alright.

I had been very drunk that night. I can't even remember what I had done. It was my birthday and I'd been out celebrating. All these thoughts haunted me eating away at me.

The possibility of that rapist being me never left my head. What if it was me? What if while I was drunk I had done something that vile and despicable? I couldn't live with that. There was also doubt and I attempted to comfort myself with the idea that it was all coincidences.

I thought about what would happen if I 'turned myself in'. I could end up in jail for years. Could I live with that? I tossed and turned at night. I couldn't shake these worries from my mind. I just wished I had conclusive evidence.

I told myself I was being stupid. What was years of jail compared to what that girl had gone through? If I had done that to her I deserved worse. There had to be some way to be able to tell for sure.

One day after four hours sleep I gave in. The report said something about a DNA test. I didn't know how they could have DNA in a rape case but if they could prove beyond doubt that it wasn't or was me, I couldn't bear that thought, then I knew I had to go. I drove to the police station at Sequim. It was the closest.

The drive was short and I could barely concentrate on the road at the thought of what I was about to do. When I opened the doors to the police station my hands were shaking.

"What can I do for you?" Asked the officer behind the counter.

"I think – I think I might be the attacker in the Isabella Swan case." I said my voice shaking even though I had taken a deep calming breath before I spoke.

"Uh, okay. What's your name?" The officer asked slightly baffled. This was probably not something he got every day. I felt awkward myself which was hard when you also felt like you were going to vomit.

"Mark Ambrose." I replied.

"Okay. Go to the doctor and get a DNA test. If it's positive you'll have a trial in a few days." The officer said filling in a few forms and handing them to me.

I took the paper and it was a form for my doctor to fill out. I went to the doctor's and got the test done on the way home. I didn't know how to tell my parent's or whether I should.

My parents had always had high hopes for me and had one drunken night ruined it? I hoped not.

"Mum, dad." I said as I had them both seated on the couch. "I went to the doctors today." I said rubbing the back of my neck nervously. How did I do this? I hoped I was wrong and what if I was.

"Why? What happened?" Mum asked concerned.

"I think I may be the attacker in the Isabella Swan case. They have DNA evidence. It was in Port Angeles on the same night I was. The guy's name was Mark and the picture looks a hell of a lot like me. I don't remember that night and I just can't get it out of my head." I ranted out all my guilty thoughts.

"That's a rape case." Mum said shocked. I nodded burying my face in my hands as the tears fell. No one knew what to say after that.

The bigger shock was when the tests came back positive and I was called to a trial on Friday. Mum cried the whole night and I wanted to join her but I was in shock. I couldn't believe it had all happened so fast. I was a criminal and I was going to go to jail. No matter how many times the thought crossed my head it didn't get any easier.

Mum and dad came with me to the trial. I could hardly breathe as I entered the room. Isabella was already there. I swore on the bible and then took a seat.

"We will now hear the prosecutor's view of the event." The judge said turning to Isabella.

"It was late at night and I was walking around Port Angeles trying to find my friend. I came across this man and two of his friends. They were heavily drunk. One of the men punched me in the face and I was shoved into another. They held me while Mark punched me in the stomach. One of the men then smashed his beer bottle over my head. I received another punch in the face as I continued to struggle. They held me down while Mark raped me. Before they left they slapped me in the face." Isabella spoke shakily only getting worse as the story went on and I couldn't help the guilt that consumed me.

She was talking about me. I had taken part in the attack she had described. I had raped her and left her for dead. I was the lowest scum on this planet.

To hear it from her and see how certain she was that it was me almost took the breath out of me.

"Thank you Miss Swan." The judge said with a crisp nod.

"Do you deny these claims?" The judge asked looking to me.

"I..." I trailed off unable to answer. Isabella's expression promised violence. She wanted justice and I wanted this guilt to go away.

"I need a yes or no Mr Ambrose." The judge said losing patience.

"No. I don't deny the claims." I gulped down the lump in my throat that came from finally speaking the incriminating words. The admittance that I, Mark Ambrose, had raped this woman.

"Thank you Mr Ambrose. Considering the DNA evidence against you I sentence you to eleven years jail with no parole." The judge said and she brought the hammer down. (**AN**: wanted it to be like thirteen or fifteen years but this wouldn't fit with the story.)

Those words were heavy. They felt they weighed a tonne. It was a cold weight that fell directly on my shoulders. I could feel them hunch over with the burden. I saw my mom and dad crying as the officer in the courtroom handcuffed me and took me to the car that would take me to jail where I would stay for the next thirteen years.

Even though I'd considered the possibility of this happening for months it felt surreal. I couldn't believe I had done that to someone. I had hurt them so much. How?

I met my new cellmate. He seemed cheerful enough. He was only a petty thief. He had been caught too many times. There was no way I could admit what I had done, to him. He kept asking but I wouldn't answer.

One week later and I needed to talk to someone. Mum, dad and my friends had abandoned me. I felt bad enough. I could see why they would though. I was a rapist. I hated myself so why would they be any different? I was a monster.

I wanted to at least talk to the girl properly. Maybe then I could feel more human.

I dialled the number I had gotten of one of the guards and waited for her to accept the call. Then a thought struck me. What if she didn't accept it? My worries were unnecessary. I heard the robotic voice announce that my call had been accepted.

"Hello? Is this Isabella Swan?" I asked cautiously. There was a pause before she answered.

"Yes." She said her voice shaky.

"I wasn't sure you'd answer. I really want to talk to you. Could you please visit me? I'll understand if you don't want to or can't." I said still very cautious but desperate.

"I don't know maybe." She said and hung up. I didn't trust that answer. It didn't seem like she thought about it. I could only hope though.

I waited for days. I was asleep and dreaming that I was walking along a dark alleyway when my form changed. I became a dark monster and I hungered for blood. A guard shaking me woke me up.

"You have a visitor." He said with a smirk.

What time was it? It was still dark. I knew that much. Who would visit at this time? I followed the guard down to the area with all the tables where other prisoners met their visitors. I hadn't been here before because I hadn't heard from anyone since I'd got here. Every time I called someone they wouldn't accept the call with the exception of Isabella. Even with this thought it still surprised when I saw my visitor. Isabella, _she_ had visited me. Then I noticed her torso. She was pregnant.

"When?" I asked looking at her bump.

Was she pregnant before, after or from that night? I could be a father. I was getting dizzy thinking about it.

"Four o'clock in the morning. That's when she woke me up this morning and that is why I'm here talking to you at four thirty. I thought you deserved to enjoy absolutely everything about your daughter." She answered frostily as I took my seat.

Her answer made me pause as I went to sit down. I was a father. I collapsed into my seat. I was a father with a girl I didn't know who hated me and I would never know my child. I wanted to scream but of course my voice wouldn't work.

"I, I…" I managed to stutter.

She remained silent as I processed this new information.

"Is that all you can say because it seems like it. You wanted to see me?" She asked raising an eyebrow.

"I wanted to say sorry, I know it's completely ridiculous, especially now." I said waving a hand at her bump, "But I wanted you to know that I'm not always like that." I pleaded.

_I_ wanted to believe those words myself.

"You don't get it do you. Do you have any idea what I have to live with now as a consequence of your actions? This baby is only half of it. I can't sleep a full night anyway because I have nightmares and sometimes when I remember that night all too well my boyfriend can't go near me. We have only kissed once in the last six months" She yelled.

"I didn't even know until I saw it on the news one and a half months ago." I stammered.

"What took you so long to hand yourself in?" She sneered.

It was shameful to admit what had made me wait so long. I couldn't admit that to her without appearing like the monster I was. She was waiting for an answer.

"There was a high probability that I would end up in jail. I was throwing my life away for guilt." I said pitifully, ashamed of myself, as I should be.

"I'm throwing my life away and it's for a heck of a lot more than guilt. I'm stuck with this." She said loudly, nearly yelling, pointing at her bump.

She was right. Because of that one stupid night she was now pregnant. I wondered why she hadn't gotten an abortion though. I thought it was common for people who had been what she had been through to get an abortion. I liked the idea of having a child regardless of the situation but why did she keep it?

"Please don't be offended but why didn't you get an abortion? I'm just curious. I thought most women in your situation got an abortion." I asked quietly not wanting to offend her. It was stupid of course. There was nothing I could do that wouldn't offend her, not anymore.

"Because I can't take a life. That would make me worse than you." She spat. I deserved that.

I sat there silently mulling in self-hatred when a thought occurred to me.

"How did you know my name?" I asked.

"I also know your birthday. You sure you wanna know how?" She asked.

"Yes." I swallowed. I could tell this was going to be as painful as hearing her emotional and horrifying story in the courtroom.

"One of your friend's said 'It's your birthday Mark' when you were deciding who got to have me." She hissed in disgust.

I couldn't help but wince in her words, the way she said them with such venom.

"You want to know what you said as you ran off into the night leaving me for dead?" She asked not caring about my answer. "See you round." She laughed. "You said 'See you round'. And now every night in my nightmare I hear 'See you round'." She said moving into hysterics now.

At the mention of nightmares I realised just what a monster I was. I gave her nightmares. All those evil criminals I had watched on the news over the years, I was now one them. I rejected that thought trying to focus on others.

"Who was in the group?" I asked. I had gone out with four of my friends but she only described a group of three. It didn't serve as a distraction though. I would never forget the exact words she had stated in the courtroom. They were etched in my brain for eternity. I couldn't help it though. Her words sunk deep into my brain and I knew I would never forget them.

"There was a short muscly man with dark hair and a lean man of average hight with light hair." She answered agitated. She clearly didn't feel like being interrogated by me.

I couldn't speak. I knew exactly who it was. I couldn't turn them in though. They could have their life. I was the real bad guy. I was the one that deserved to be behind bars. They had hurt this poor woman but neither of them as much as me.

"You want me to track them down for you. Maybe they can keep you company." She suggested casually.

"Would you turn in one of your friends?" I asked looking her in the eyes which was hard.

"Would you rape someone?" She asked tilting her head to the side and watching as I flinched. I knew she took enjoyment from the knowledge that I was suffering as much as her and I deserved to suffer.

"How old are you?" She asked.

"Eighteen." I answered. She laughed. I didn't know why. It wasn't a crazy hysterical laugh which made me wonder what train of thought she was following.

"It's good to know that at least if I miss my opportunity at college you do too." She said happily. It made sense now. She was right. Who knows the damage I could have done at college. I was glad I had learned my lesson about alcohol early. That night hadn't my first drunken night in Port Angeles.

I heard my cellmate's familiar voice call out "Holy fucking shit."

"Who's that?" She asked raising an eyebrow.

"My cellmate." I muttered.

"You didn't tell me you had a girlfriend or that you were a father." Craig said elbowing me in the ribs painfully. I hated Craig when he got excited and unfortunately it was often.

"I'm not his girlfriend." She hissed.

"Well fuck. Little Mark is a rapist. Who would have thought? No wonder you didn't tell us." Craig said elbowing me again once he put all the pieces of the puzzle together. He was surprisingly smart for a criminal and it made me wonder how he got caught.

"Go away." I muttered. I didn't want to talk to Craig. I would get an earful later.

"I'll see you round. If you do find some way to escape though let me know." Craig laughed as he went off to annoy someone else.

"I'm going to go. Charlie will probably wonder where I am." Isabella decided.

I wondered who Charlie was briefly but I was more concerned about her leaving, I didn't want her to leave. I grabbed her arm.

"Please don't go." I pleaded.

"Get your hands off of me." She said through gritted teeth, "Before I tear them off."

"I'm sorry." I said removing my hands. I should've known. As if she would let a disgusting creature like me touch her after what I had done to her.

"Do you think I could?…" I said eyeing my bump. I really wanted to touch my child. That possibility seemed surreal. I knew it was virtually impossible after what had just happened and I didn't deserve it but I was desperate.

She looked shocked for a moment and then thought it through turning her face so I couldn't see.

"Maybe you should get a feel for what you've done. You can think about it in your cell while you sit there and rot." She said turning back to me.

For once I ignored her harsh words as I hesitantly reached out hand and placed it on her bump that was the focus of my attention. Her skin had goose bumps where I touched it but I knew that was inevitable. I marvelled at the fact that there was a child in there, my child.

"Does she have a name?" I asked. I remembered her referring to it as a 'she' before.

"Marie Charlotte Swan until the adoption papers go through." She answered. It was a nice name, of course.

"What are the couple like?" I asked looking up at her. I understood why she would put it up for adoption. Why would she want to keep a reminder of that night? I wished it were reversed. If I was able to remember that night I wouldn't be drunk and it would never have happened.

"I've only met them once. Their names are Janine and Mark. I'm assuming he's the good Mark." She said pursing her lips.

"I used to think I was too." I mumbled to myself as I took my hands of her bump. She had a life. She should go.

"See you round." She said as she left. She didn't mean them. I knew it and she knew it.

I knew those were the last words I had said to her. They haunted her and now they would haunt me. They would remind me of the awful deed I had done.

**The guard then took me back to my cell. I don't know how Craig had gotten out; he'd been in here too long and he had learnt tricks. I had noticed he got away with a lot of things. Everyone was meant to be in their cell asleep. Craig was back in his cell when I arrived.**

"She's a nice girl." Craig sighed.

"I know." I replied. I knew what he was getting at. She was a nice girl so why had I done it? Craig had spent a bit of time with me and he was constantly saying how I was far too innocent to be in prison.

I sat on my bed knowing that there was no way of getting out of this conversation. I was going to spend the next two years with Craig (His sentence was lighter than mine) and we were going to have to talk eventually.

"What happened?" Craig asked.

"I was drunk. She was alone. That's about all I know." I said trying not to remember just how much I knew. When I closed my eyes I could see it clearly now. I could remember every little detail. I deserved to die in here.

"It could be worse." Craig said optimistically. I didn't share his optimism.

"How?' I asked raising an eyebrow.

"You could be like the other rapists in here and not have any remorse. You feel horrible for what you're done." Craig said.

I didn't answer. I didn't know what to say. I don't think there was anything I could say. He was wrong. Not about the remorse but how it made things better. It didn't. I was still here and she was still pregnant. The night had still happened, I tried not to think the thought but it was there, unavoidable.

I asked to write a letter. I wanted to let mum and dad know.

I tried my hardest not to cry as I wrote the letter and thought about how I hadn't seen or heard from any of my friends and family. They had broken all ties with me. Craig wouldn't care if I cried but the other prisoners would and I really didn't want to get a black eye or broken nose so early in my stay.

I wondered if I should send the two friends that had been with me that night a letter. Part of me wanted company while the rest knew that I couldn't do that to a friend.

That night I had a nightmare. In my nightmare I saw the night again replayed in my head like whenever I shut my eyes. I could remember it even clearer now. I could remember everything, every little detail. I could tell you what everyone was wearing. What her handbag looked like and most importantly what happened. I saw it all. I wanted to wake up but I couldn't. There was no waking up from reality.

A week or so later I got a surprise. Mum and dad came to visit. They told me it was because they spoke with Isabella.

About a month later I got another surprise. The two friends who had been with me that night had been caught, they said they had seen Isabella. I knew they knew that Bella was pregnant but we didn't talk about it. There was no point.


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter Eight**

"Alice." I growled as I saw the decorations that filled the room. I was glad I had made a limit on the guest list.

Mum, Charlotte, Angela, Rose, Esme and Janine were coming for the baby shower. Alice had wanted a guest list of fifty. I could only imagine how that would go.

"Presents go over here." Alice said to mum who put her present on the table

Mum had come early and had come to the Cullen's with me for the baby shower.

"That had better not be for me." I groaned when I saw the chair with a sash that read 'Mummy's chair' draped over the back of it. It was a huge rocking chair that stood out amongst all the other chairs.

"You bet it is and don't think you're getting out of it." Alice said wagging her finger at me. I rolled my eyes and took a seat.

"Still don't get why boys can't come." I muttered under my breath. I should have known Alice would hear it.

"Because it's a baby shower." Alice said exasperated.

There was a knock at the door before I had a chance to complain about anything else.

"I'm not too early am I?" I heard Charlotte ask from the doorway.

"No, you're right on time." Alice said as she let her in.

"Hey Charlotte. Hey Raquel." I greeted Charlotte and her baby.

"Hey Bella. Hey Marie." Charlotte teased patting my belly.

"You've definitely grown since the last time I saw you." Charlotte laughed.

"Yep. Unfortunately." I sighed. Charlotte shook her head and gave me a pat on the back before taking a seat.

Alice answered the rest of the knocks on the door and eventually everyone was there. Angela looked as though she felt a bit awkward so I kept her company.

"Okay present time." Alice announced once everyone was seated. Alice handed me a present to open.

I hated presents and Alice knew this but I opened it up. There was a beautiful mobile to hang above the crib. It had cute baby animals dangling from it.

"I thought your crib could use a bit of decoration." Alice said with a smile.

"Thank you." I said.

I opened the next present to see a baby Bjorn. It was a piece of material that went over one shoulder and you cradled the baby the material at the front. There was a buckle to tighten and loosen it.

"It's good for keeping your hands free." Charlotte smiled.

"Thank you so much." I said sincerely. I would definitely need that even we only kept Marie for a week.

The next present was a diaper bag from mum who was always practical. I got a swaddling cloth from Rose and a blanket from Janine. Angela brought me a pregnancy cast kit, which I didn't know if I would use. It would certainly be interesting to look back on in a few years. Esme brought Marie a cute little outfit. Once I was done with the presents Alice took them back to the table.

"And now we have the games." Alice announced excitedly.

Alice darted out of the room for a second and then came back with a tray full of baby diapers. I noticed there was a brown smudge in all of them. I wondered what we had to do. I didn't have to wait long before Alice explained.

"Okay. In each of these diapers is a melted chocolate. The aim of the game is to determine just which chocolate!" Alice said all bubbly with excitement as she set the tray on the table.

"I'm out. Unless it has cream it's all the same to me." I laughed putting my hands up.

Alice rolled her eyes but didn't protest. Everyone else laughed.

"My sense of smell is slowly returning to normal." Charlotte said with a smile.

"And how many months is Raquel?" I groaned.

"One month. It's not that long really." Charlotte promised.

"Okay. Who's going first?" Alice asked looking around the table.

"I will Esme offered.

"Definitely a Snickers." Esme said sniffing at the diaper. Alice turned it over to look at the other side. She wrote it down on a piece of paper. They went through the same process for every diaper and then every person.

"Okay the winner is… Janine." Alice said like she was announcing at some prestigious awards show.

Janine got up to accept the prize of a whole jar of chocolates.

"Okay. Next game is 'find the safety pins'." Alice said and she came back into the room with a baby bath full of sand.

"Who's going first? The winner is the person who finds the most safety pins in a minute." Alice said.

"I'll try." I offered raising my hand.

"Here we go." Alice said placing the bath in front of me.

I rifled my hand through the sand trying to find the small pieces of metal. They were so tiny. I don't know how I managed to find so many.

"Remember you're number. Fifty-six." Alice said as she counted the safety pins.

I nodded and she moved on the next person. I was astonished by how many safety pins Charlotte pulled out.

"New mother." Charlotte said with a smile as Alice announced Charlotte had found eighty-three safety pins.

Charlotte received her jar of chocolates and we chatted idly.

"Did you have any food planned?" I asked Alice, as it appeared the games were over.

"No. Are you hungry?" Alice asked confused.

"Are you insane?" I asked her raising an eyebrow. She should know by now that I was always hungry.

"_I_ don't think so." Alice said indignantly crossing her arms across her chest.

"I'll get some food." Esme said kindly as she got up from her chair. She came back later with a plate of biscuits, dip and cheese.

I ate a few biscuits before Esme came back with meatballs.

"These are good and without cream. I could only imagine them with cream." I said my mouth drooling, as I tasted one of Esme's meatballs.

"Thank you." Esme said unsure of how to take that compliment. Everyone laughed and we chatted some more. It was good fun.

Janine and Angela left and mum and Esme started the clean up. Rosalie went upstairs to her room where Emmett was waiting. Edward and Jasper had gone out and found something else to do.

"I went to see him yesterday." I said to Charlotte who joined me on the couch.

"You didn't tell me that. Why did you go?" Charlotte asked.

"To be honest. I don't know. I was angry and it was four in the morning." I sighed.

"What happened?" Charlotte asked her voice full of curiosity.

"He told me he wasn't like that, only when he was drunk. He said he didn't even know until the recent news stories came on. He asked questions about the baby and the adoptive parents." I said completely frustrated.

Charlotte remained silent.

"I let him touch me. I let him place his hand on my baby." I sighed increasingly frustrated but with myself now.

"You're not crazy." Charlotte finally said.

"I'm not?" I asked unsure.

"You're pregnant." Charlotte said with a smile.

"Thanks that makes me feel better." I said blushing.

"It should." Charlotte said with a determined nod of her head.

"I'll see you soon I hope." Charlotte said as she got off the couch with Raquel in her arms.

"Yeah, me too. See you." I waved her Goodbye.

I lay back on the couch, which was surprisingly comfortable. The next thing I knew I was asleep. It was a peaceful sleep. I dreamt that I was walking across the beach. A little girl held my hand. She looked to be about four. We laughed and skipped along the beach. Then I saw him but it wasn't the 'him' that usually appeared in my dreams. It was Edward. He looked happy to see me. He took my other hand and we skipped along the beach. The sun came down and we sat and watched the sunset.

The first thing I heard when I woke up was the sound of a camera taking a photo. I blinked my eyes open to see Edward taking a picture of me lying on the couch.

"What was that for?" I asked.

"You looked so peaceful." Edward said.

"You know it's also your first day of maternity leave." Edward said joining me on the couch.

"Yeah. Alice wanted the baby shower as a celebration." I said rolling my eyes. That was so typically Alice.

"You know what you have tomorrow right?" Edward asked raising an eyebrow.

"Yes I do. I also know what I have planned for the day after. I'm a very busy woman." I said sarcastically.

"I heard that." Emmett called from upstairs. I knew he was referring to the innuendo that could be made from what I had just said.

"Yay, Emmett can hear." I cheered sarcastically.

Edward laughed. I think I even heard Rosalie laugh.

I was trying to distract myself from the fact that tomorrow would be my first birthing class. Edward had of course offered to take me and I allowed him to come. You were meant to have the father with you but there was no way that was happening. Edward was much better anyway.

"Okay. Welcome everyone. My name is Rylie. I am your instructor for the day. It's good to see a few old and new faces." She said looking around the room. "We're going to start by introducing ourselves. We're going to go around the room Just one person from the pair introduce yourselves, your partner and say something about the baby." She said and then she turned to us and I figured that we were starting.

I didn't want to talk. Edward knew this and so he spoke for me.

"I'm Edward and this is Bella. It's a girl who we're going to name Marie. She's due on the 15th of September." Edward said.

The next few couples introduced themselves. All the other mothers were six and a half months too. Some were just a little bit further along but not by much. As I listened and looked around I noticed I was the biggest. That'd be right I thought to myself. Damn Mark and his big baby.

Rylie then proceeded to inform us on every single detail of birth. She did warn us first but it didn't stop everyone going completely green in the gills, even those who had been there before. I took a deep breath and reminded myself that I had chosen this.

Rylie then showed us the Lamaze breathing technique. I didn't get how breathing different would help me throughout the whole process but if that's what they thought well help it couldn't hurt to try it.

I didn't complain when they taught us a massage that the 'husband' could use on the mother. Of course Edward did the massage perfectly. It was all I could do to stop the moan that threatened to escape my lips.

"That good?" Edward said when he saw how much I was enjoying his massage.

"You have no idea." I laughed.

There was a short break for all the mothers to go to the toilet. I watched as Edward got up lithely and received glares from many of the women. He helped me up and waited patiently as I went to the toilet.

The rest of the class was pretty boring so I was happy when we went back home.

I stayed home that night. Edward said he was going to go home. Maybe his thoughts were on all the details of giving birth that Riley had given us.

I was sound asleep on the couch when Charlie woke me up. "What is it?" I asked groggily searching for a clock.

"Edward, Jasper and Emmett are being held in a cell at the police station." Charlie said.

"What, why?" I asked.

"They were caught in a punch-up." Charlie said just as confused as I was.

"Let's go." I sighed.

"So you're Edward's… I'm assuming." The office said unable to take his eyes of my bump. Charlie cleared his throat behind me.

"I'm his girlfriend. What happened?" I asked

"He was found fighting two men. He says they're your attackers." The officer said looking for me for further explanation.

"They looked exactly like your drawings." Carlisle said rounding the corner with Rosalie and Alice.

"Let Emmet, Jasper and Edward out. I'll pay bail." Rosalie said.

The office nodded and went to release them.

"Uh, uh. Keep Edward in there for another half an hour. I don't care if they're my attackers he knows better." I added before the officer had even gone round the corner to the cell.

"You saw them?" I asked turning to Carlisle.

"Yes, I did. I was smart enough to run though." Carlisle grimaced.

"Can I see the other two men?" I asked the officer as he came back with Jasper and Emmett.

"They're in with Edward." The officer said raising an eyebrow.

"Just fine." I promised following him in.

"Bella." Edward said when he saw me.

"I'm not here for you, another half an hour. Like I said." I spoke crisply turning my attention to the other two men who looked up to see who I was. It was them alright.

"Do you know Mark Ambrose?" I asked.

"I asked that before I punched them." Edward said frustrated. I ignored him.

"Yeah we know Mark. How do you know him?" The musclier one asked.

"You know Mark's in jail right?" I asked looking to his friends.

"Yes, wait… you're her?" The blonde haired man asked realising who I was.

"Yes. I though you would know. You were there." I said darkly although my voice wanted to crack under the pressure of the memory.

"You're sure?" The officer asked from where he stood beside me. I nodded.

"It's them." I assured him.

"I don't even know you." The intimidating man said looking me over.

"Mark didn't either but I'm carrying his baby." I shrugged.

"You're what?" The other one asked.

"That's how we knew for certain it was him." I said my eyes focused on the two men.

"Okay if you're certain Miss Swan then these two have a court date in a few days. Edward can join you whenever you're ready.

"Still a half an hour." I muttered as I followed the officer back to the waiting room.

I didn't mind sitting around for half an hour. I picked up a magazine and read. It was hard to focus on the pages though. My thoughts kept turning to the two men. We had found them. I didn't know whether to hate Edward or love him. I needed this time to think. He should've known better. He could've just handed them to the police, surely. Why did he have to start a fight with them?

I was sure Esme had raised him better than picking a fight with people no matter how much they deserved it. I couldn't help the thoughts that invaded my mind when I thought of Esme raising Edward.

Edward had offered to help me raise this baby. I could keep it. I could become a kindergarten teacher and raise a family with Edward. No matter how angry I was at him I still loved him. Did I want to raise this baby though? Could I? Could I look into her eyes everyday and not see her father? I didn't think so.

"It's been half an hour. Do you want me to let him out?" The officer asked interrupting my thoughts.

"Yes." I said standing up.

The officer brought Edward out and he looked like he was going to say something but he thought the better of it.

We walked silently to the car his family had left and he drove me home. He seemed to know better than to speak. I didn't want to talk. He shouldn't have picked a fight with those men. He could've gotten hurt. I knew what they had done to me and although they definitely wouldn't go that far with Edward they would still hurt him.

I'd been in hospital for a week after that night. I didn't want that to happen to Edward. At least if they were all in jail then he wouldn't feel the need to start a fight with anyone.

I was happy that they were in jail. I didn't want them wandering the streets hurting other women but that didn't change the fact that Edward had put himself at risk. He was my life. Didn't he see that?

He dropped me off taking me all the way to the door.

"I'll see you tomorrow." He said and turned to leave.

I had noticed his nose was bleeding and he had a cut lip on the way home. It had been three against two and the other men were severely hurt as well but I didn't want Edward hurt.

"Come in." I sighed. I didn't want to send him home bleeding.

He sat down on the seat that I pulled out for him and I grabbed a wet washcloth off the sink. I wiped his nose lightly concentrating hard to stop myself from yelling at him like I wanted to. It had been hard enough in the car.

"Don't ever do that again." I said lightly managing to control myself. I felt proud. That was a first for me ever since I became pregnant.

"We saw them and I knew for sure it was them because of the pictures. I asked them if they knew Mark. They said yes so I punched them. After all they had done to you, leaving you in that Alley to die. I couldn't just walk away." Edward said looking at the floor.

"Yes you could. You could've put one foot in front of the other and walked away. The police are there for a reason Edward. Let them deal with things like this. I was in hospital for a week after they were through with me. Don't you think it scares me what they could've done to you? I can't lose you over some stupid fight." I yelled at him, so much for control.

"Exactly, they hurt you so much. I nearly lost you and they did that. I could not walk away." Edward said defiantly.

"Yes you could Edward. It hurt you to nearly loose me so imagine if I nearly lost you. That is why you can walk away. I don't want to hear that you're in jail ever again. I might not bail you out." I yelled at him, lying.

Of course I would bail him out. I couldn't live without him.

**Author's note**

Aww...all nice and mushy!**  
**


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter Nine: Edward's POV**

I sat down on the seat. Bella didn't look happy and she had made me stay in that cell for a longer time than the others. She hadn't said a thing the entire way home. I knew she was mad but she wasn't speaking to me. It actually made me more anxious. I concentrated on my driving.

I couldn't leave her after tonight. I took her all the way to her door.

"I'll see you tomorrow." I said not wanting to leave.

"Come in." She sighed. I wanted to come in but at the same time I didn't. I wanted to be with her but I didn't want her angry at me.

I sat down on the seat that she pulled out. She went to the sink and got a washcloth. I realised that my nose and lip were bleeding. It had been a close fight. We outnumbered them but they were good fighters. I was just glad they were going to get what they deserved.

Bella was gentle as she wiped my nose and lip.

"Don't ever do that again." She said quietly and I was worried this was the calm before the storm. Was there even a storm?

"We saw them and I knew for sure it was them because of the pictures. I asked them if they knew Mark. They said yes so I punched them. After all they had done to you. Leaving you in that Alley to die. I couldn't just walk away." I said. I had to explain. I had to let her know. I couldn't look at her though. I looked at the floor. I saw Bella's face everywhere I looked so it didn't make a difference.

"Yes you could. You could've put one foot in front of the other and walked away. The police are there for a reason Edward. Let them deal with things like this. I was in hospital for a week after they were through with me. Don't you think it scares me what they could've done to you? I can't loose you over some stupid fight." She screamed. I should've shut up. Maybe I hadn't explained it right

"Exactly. They hurt you so much. I nearly lost you and they did that. I could not walk away." I tried again.

"Yes you could Edward. It hurt you to nearly loose me so imagine if I nearly lost you. That is why you can walk away. I don't want to hear that you're in jail ever again. I might not bail you out." She yelled and I swallowed the lump in my throat.

"Happy birthday Bella." I said with a huge smile as she opened the door.

"I'm due in a week. Do not even think about forcing any celebrations on me." She warned and went to sit back on the couch.

"It's okay love. One more week." I promised.

"Did you just call me love?" She asked.

"Yes?" I said wondering what was wrong.

She thought about something for a moment and then shook her head.

"So what are we doing for your birthday?" I asked.

"Nothing. Unless you want to put a movie on, I'll probably just fall asleep." She said getting comfortable on the couch which looked impossible. I felt so sorry for her.

She had been very irritable lately and if more than one person was hovering over her she was prone to yelling. It was close to her due date and everyone was nervous. Her mother was down in case the baby came early.

We had everything in my car ready to go. We even had a list of people to call. Everyone would probably be there though. Bella wanted Charlotte there.

I could see why Bella liked Charlotte. Charlotte was a very nice, friendly, helpful person and she had been through the same thing as Bella. I was glad Bella had her to talk to. She always felt better after she talked to Charlotte and that made me feel better too.

"No presents?" I asked putting on my best puppy dog eyes. They were nowhere near as effective as Alice but I knew the effect they had on Bella. Bella shut her eyes and shook her head, cheater.

"If I allowed presents you know what Alice would get me." She moaned.

"Yes I do. She would get you stuff you need." I said trying to point out that Bella needed more baby/nursery items. I wanted to live as a family with Bella but she had told me she couldn't. I wouldn't force her into anything.

"I don't need..." Bella said but she was interrupted by a gasp as she clutched at her bump.

"What is it?' I asked.

"I think. I think I just felt a contraction." She sputtered clutching her side.

"Are you sure?" I asked. I was prepared but now the moment was finally here I was scared.

"Yes, very." Bella nodded clenching her teach and clutching her side again.

"Okay, let's go." I said helping her up.

"Who have we got to call?" I asked as we walked out to the Volvo.

"Charlotte and your family." She said without a moments hesitation.

"Can you call while I drive?" I asked opening the door to help her in.

"Edward!" She screamed.

"It means they'll get here quicker." I defended myself.

"Give me your phone." She sighed holding out her hand.

I gave her my phone and drove off towards the hospital. If my driving had been manic before it was diabolical now. Bella didn't comment as she called everyone.

I concentrated on the road rather than listening to her phone conversation. She was done just on time as we pulled into the hospital. I ran round to Bella's side and helped her out.

"You okay?" I asked as we rushed up to the reception desk.

"I'm fine Edward bre..." She started to say but she was interrupted by what I can only assume were her waters breaking. I could see the wetness leak over her dress.

"Come on." I said helping her up to the reception desk.

"Chair, stat." The nurse called when she saw us approaching.

A man came up to us with a chair and Bella sat in it. They wheeled her round to the birthing suite.

"If you could take a seat in the chair and get changed the doctor will be with you shortly." The man said before leaving.

I turned as Bella got changed and then helped her up to the bed was she was done.

Minutes later Carlisle came in.

"Bella." Carlisle exclaimed when he saw her.

"Hey." Bella said before clenching her teeth as another contraction hit.

"Have you called everyone?" Carlisle asked.

"Yep." Bella said managing to smile.

"Okay. Let's have a look and see how long we have left." Carlisle said and checked to see how dilated Bella was.

"Only two centimetres so far I'm afraid, Bella. It's going to be a while yet. I'll be back in just under an hour. Just go through what you practiced in that birthing class with Edward." Carlisle said as he left.

Bella was good. She didn't panic. She just kept breathing deeply using the Lamaze technique. I held her hand and she squeezed it every time a contraction hit. I gave her a massage on the shoulder as she had her back against the chair.

Alice, Rose, Em and Jasper came to visit not too long after Carlisle left. They could only come in two at a time because of visitor restrictions.

Emmett and Jasper were the first in so they wouldn't have to come in later. That was a very smart decision. It made me wonder whether I should be here. I had talked to Bella about it and she said she was fine with me staying. I wanted to be there for her and she wanted to be there for me.

"Hey Bells. Really happening, ey?" Emmett said as he came into the room.

"uhuh." Bella agreed wincing as yet another contraction hit.

Jasper just rocked back and forth clearly uncomfortable.

"I'm only two centimetres. Carlisle says it's going to be a few hours yet." Bella said making conversation despite what she was going through.

"Don't yell at me but I can't wait to meet her.' Jasper smiled a little more comfortable.

"I want to see my niece." Emmett said making us all laugh, even Bella who did pause to flinch at a contraction.

Carlisle came in and took another measurement while the boys were there. They turned around out of politeness.

"Four centimetres." Carlisle announced

I heard Bella let out an exasperated groan. Carlisle gave her a grimace and left again. He obviously didn't want to crowd her. He was a very good doctor who knew what he was doing.

"You guys can go get Alice and Rose if you want." I suggested with a glance at Bella who gave a small nod.

The boys left and I heard Emmett's booming voice from the waiting room. "I want one." He must be talking to Rose. I had to laugh at what she would say to that and Bell did too. We could practically hear Emmett getting slapped on the head now.

Rosalie and Alice came in a moment later and Rose did look infuriated until she saw Bella and she felt instant sympathy. We all did. Bella was the bravest person I knew.

"How you going?" Alice asked her voice full of pity.

"Not the question to ask, Alice." Bella spoke through gritted teeth as another contraction hit.

"Sorry." Alice winced.

"It's okay. So Rose when are we expecting to see an Emmett Junior?" Bella asked teasingly. Rose growled.

"I was feeling incredibly sorry for you but now that it is all gone. You're not going to see and Emmett Junior for a long time. One Emmett is bad enough. I can't believe _this_ is encouraging him." She hissed.

Everyone had to laugh at Rosalie's anguish and eventually even Rosalie joined in.

"Me next." Charlotte said poking her head through the door.

"See you Bella." Rose and Alice said and departed.

"Hey." Bella said her features brightening with true happiness as she saw her good friend.

"She grows so quick. I swear she's bigger every time I see her." Bella said admiring Raquel.

"Yeah. I can't let you hold her though. You'd probably squeeze her to death." Charlotte teased. Bella didn't argue.

"Please tell me it gets better." Bella pleaded somewhat dubiously.

"It does. You get a beautiful baby to hold in your arms and you know it's all worth it." Charlotte smiled.

Bella huffed and curled in on herself as another contraction hit.

"She's beautiful." I said looking into the cot where Marie Charlotte Swan lay. She was the most beautiful baby I had seen. She had so much of her mother in her.

Bella was exhausted and sleeping. They had already woken her to show her how to breastfeed. I had left the room for that. The nurses only woke Bella when Marie needed feeding.

Marie and Bella were sleeping and the door opened. I looked up to see an orange jumpsuit. What was he doing here? If he hadn't had two police escorts I would have beat the living daylights after him.

"What are you doing here?" I asked although it was more of a growl.

"I got a call from Charlotte Henry." He said bewildered.

I thought Charlotte had been a good friend of Bella's but it would appear I thought wrong. I would have to talk with Charlotte next time I saw her. Just how did she think this would help Bella? She had gone through the same thing so I could only hope like hell she knew what she was doing and that I didn't. I was very doubtful that Charlotte knew Bella better than I did.

Mark's eyes were on Marie. I felt overpowered with the paternal urge to stand in front of her cot and protect her. I knew little of this man but what little I knew was enough for me to hate him.

"What are you doing here?" I asked.

"I came to see Bella and Marie. Well mainly Marie. I didn't really think Bella would like to see me." His eyes moved to glance at Bella's sleeping form.

"You're lucky she's not awake to deal with you." I said my arms crossed.

"I know." He smiled. It made my urge to bash his brains in rise but to my surprise I kept a level head.

"I don't think Bella would want you here. You should go." I said stiffly. I could see annoyance flash over one of the police man's face. He clearly didn't appreciate escorting a criminal all the way out here just to turn around again.

"Please?" Mark begged.

He looked pathetic staring at me with his pleading eyes. I couldn't hate him. That was his baby and he had as much right to see it as Bella. He was a father and all he wanted was to be with his daughter. I just wished that it wasn't Bella's daughter as well.

"Just don't wake up Bella she needs her sleep." I gave in hesitantly.

"I won't." Mark promised and he walked over to the cot flanked by the two officers.

He reached into the cot but his hands were handcuffed so all he could do was stroke Marie who was fast asleep with no intention of waking up.

"She's asleep so you couldn't really hold her anyway." I consoled. Mark gave me a grimace.

"I hope you and Isabella are happy together." Mark said glancing sideways to me.

"Thank you." I said restrained.

He stood there for a good half an hour. He was lucky that Bella or Marie didn't wake up. We didn't talk. He just enjoyed being with his baby. The officers with him relaxed but didn't move from their position.

Eventually one of the officers gave an unsubtle cough and Mark looked up. They left and I took a seat beside Bella.

Bella was trying not to get too attached but I could tell she was. Every time she saw her daughter, that she had put so much time and effort into, her miracle. Everyone had come to see her then in groups of four; Alice, Jasper, Em and Rose; Janine, Mr Hills, Charlie and Renee. Chantelle came in by herself after everyone was done. She had to go early because of Raquel.

Bella was allowed to sleep as much as possible by all the guests (except of course Emmett) and after two days of recovery she was allowed to go home. She was wheeled to the entrance of the hospital. I drove her home in my car. She sat in the back seat with Marie.

"Do you think you can give her up now?" I asked.

"I have too. This isn't just about me." She said calmly but I could tell I should keep quiet or I would get yelled at. I had way too much experience with them to know Bella's limits exactly.

"Ready to go?" I asked as a nurse waited with a hospital wheelchair.

"Of course." Bella grinned, her legs dangling over the edge of the bed. She sat herself in the wheelchair and I handed her Marie.

"Have you talked to the Hills?" I asked.

"They haven't made a decision yet but don't get your hopes up Edward." Bella warned. I had to laugh.

"I won't." I promised.

The nurse wheeled Bella out to the front entrance of the hospital where Alice had my car waiting. Bella placed Marie in the car seat and I helped with the seatbelt from the other side. We hopped in and Alice drove home.

"Do you want me to stay a while and you can get some more sleep?" I asked as we stopped at Bella's house.

"That would be good. It's been a few years since Charlie's taken care of a baby." Bella smiled sheepishly Marie bundled in her arms.

"Not long enough." Charlie grunted on the other side of the door. Edward and I both laughed.

We all trudged upstairs and Bella went to bed after putting Marie in her crib. They looked so peaceful. I sat in the rocking chair and before long I was asleep.

The sound of a baby crying woke me up. Bella was still asleep obviously exhausted so I tried to figure out what was wrong without her help.

I checked her nappy but it was empty. I bounced her on my knee a few times but she still cried. I went downstairs to Charlie. He suggested I use the stroller and take her for a walk and so I did but she was still crying although it was considerably less. I'd remember the stroller trick next time.

Charlie had no ideas so I went up to Bella. There was only one possible option left. Marie was hungry. I hated waking up Bella but I had no choice.

"What's wrong?" She asked when she heard Marie crying. She held out her arms to take Marie from me and I handed her over.

"She's hungry." I explained sheepishly.

"Oh, okay." She said and I left the room.

"You can come back in." She called after a few seconds. I walked in cautiously and Bella was feeding Marie under a blanket.

"You that kid's cousin or somthin'?" A granny snapped as she walked past us in the park.

"No, I'm adopted. My sister is much older than me. It's her baby." I said quickly before Bella could say anything.

"She's beautiful. Tell your sister I said congratulations." The granny winked.

"Did she just wink at you?" Bella sniggered when the granny was out of hearing distance.

"I think she did." I said astounded.

We did a lap of the park before returning home.

It was our last day with Marie. The Hills had chosen to adopt Marie. They had been okay with waiting six months while Bella breastfed Marie. It wasn't entirely necessary but it was an excuse. It wouldn't be easy to let her go but Bella was adamant we should move on with our lives.

I wanted to stay at the park with Bella and Marie forever but it just couldn't happen. I took the drive home incredibly slow. I usually drove maniacally fast but now I was at least 10k's below the speed limit. There were no cars behind us and Bella didn't comment on my speed.

We sat in the lounge room with Marie as we waited for the Hill's to come. They were right on time, they had probably wanted to be early but knew how much we didn't want to give Marie up.

Bella kept thinking of baby products and asked the Hills if they had them. Of course they did. I didn't know what we were going to do with the stuff we had. We could probably store it for future use.

We stood out the front of the house and watched the Hills drive off with Marie knowing we wouldn't see her for a long time if at all.

I saw Bella crying out of the corner of my eye and enveloped her in a hug. We would all miss Marie.

**Author's Note**

Naw, bye Marie. Not the last of her yet though.**  
**


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter Ten: Marie's POV**

"Good morning sweetheart." Mum's voice called as she pulled back my curtains. I groaned. I didn't want to wake up.

"Happy Birthday Marie." Mum said as she kissed me on the forehead. I smiled.

At least it was going to be a good day. It was my sixteenth birthday. I'd had my party the weekend before. It wasn't huge. I didn't really care for huge celebrations. I just went to a nice restaurant with a group of my friends. It was a nice celebration. My friends had all been quite extravagant with their celebrations.

Mum left the room so I could get ready. I got ready quickly and sat at the breakfast table. They were already sitting there eating breakfast. I looked around for presents. Mum caught me looking.

"This afternoon." She said with a smile. Dad shook his head with a small smile as he ate his cereal.

"Can I get my license this afternoon?" I asked.

"Sure." Mum said with a frown. I wondered what was wrong. I guess she just didn't want to think of me being old enough to drive. I really wanted to though.

"See you." Dad said as he grabbed his briefcase and went out the door. He worked as a lawyer and he was quite good.

I went to school. For some reason I was still concerned about mum's frown. She had been very quiet on the way to school.

"What were your parents like on your birthday?" I asked one of my friends.

"They kept going on and on about how I was old enough to drive a car. They said it made them feel old." She laughed. I nodded. That was probably what my mother was worried about. I went back to paying attention to the teacher.

"So are you getting your licence this afternoon?" My friend asked.

"Yeah, I think so. Mum said I could." I shrugged.

"Kool." She replied and went back to her work.

I jumped into the car quickly when mum picked me up this afternoon. I was very excited about getting my license.

"Hey, sweetheart." Mum greeted me with a tense smile.

"Hey." I replied back.

Mum drove out of the school and it wasn't for another ten minutes that I noticed we weren't going in the right direction. I was too excited and worried.

"Where are we going?" I asked.

"On the back seat." Mum said and I turned to the backseat to see a piece of paper. I picked it up and looked at it. It was my birth certificate. I'd need it for my license. I read through it wondering why this would mean we had to go in the direction mum was taking me.

"What?" I asked when I saw the names of my mother and father on my birth certificate didn't match up to the names of my mother and father.

"Why does it say Isabella Swan and Mark Ambrose? Your name's Janine and our last name is Hills." I said.

"Because you're adopted, your biological father shares the same name. It was a coincidence." Mum said with a deep sigh.

"What, how?" I asked. It couldn't be real. It couldn't be. How was I adopted? This was a bad joke so then why was mum the one playing it?

"Like I said it was a coincidence." Mum exhaled.

"I meant how am I adopted?" I wanted to yell and as it was my voice was so loud the silence after seemed tangible. It was a heavy silence.

"She was eighteen. She didn't think she could take care of you." Mum, Janine (ughh this is so confusing) said after a long while.

I sat in the passenger seat reading the birth certificate. Apparently my real mother lived in Forks an hour or so away. How could she live an hour away and I not know?

"Are we going to see her?" I asked. I noticed my birth certificate said that my dad had been in Port Angeles state prison. I didn't think we were going to see him.

"Yeah." Mum answered quietly.

"Why's is he in prison?" I wondered.

"I'll let her tell you although she may not be able too." Mum said.

"Why not?" I asked.

"That's part of the story. You'll have to wait." Mum said her brow furrowing. I was worried that she wouldn't be able to drive.

The rest of the trip was silent. I couldn't believe my birthday which had promised to be so good had turned so sour. I was very interested to see my biological mother though. It would be interesting to see the similarities.

I had always sort of wondered about the subtle differences between myself and my family. They were very subtle though so I often ignored them.

My hair was a light chocolate brown and it lighter than mum and dad's. I assumed mum dies her hair and that I had the same colour as her.

My eyes were a light icy blue. I wondered where I got them from too because my dad's eye's were green and my mothers were hazel. I don't know how I had ever ignored that one. I'd never really thought about it this deeply before I suppose. You just don't question it.

I also knew that my mum was a social person who loved to entertain guests. I hated that. I hated attention. I was a klutz and that wasn't very good if you were the centre of attention.

Mum pulled up in front of a house. I looked it over. It was a double story white house. It looked very cozy and homely. I saw a police car parked outside the house. It was in the driveway so it looked like the person who owned the house was a police officer, not in trouble with the police.

Mum knocked on the door and I felt a knot form in my throat. An old man answered the door. He looked to be in his fifties.

"Hey Charlie, do you know where Isabella is?" Mum asked the man.

"Yeah. She and Edward got married. They have a house down the road. Come in and I'll draw you a mud map." He said glancing at me. I wondered if he knew who I was.

We followed Charlie into the kitchen and he drew a map. He handed it to mum and we left.

"Happy birthday." He called to me as we left. I blushed. He did know. Then I felt angry. He knew and I had only just found out. How did he know?

"Who's that?" I asked once we were in the car.

"You're biological grandfather." Mum answered crisply as she started the car and we drove off using the map Charlie had drawn.

"Isabella's father?" I guessed.

"Yeah." Mum nodded and that was it for our conversation until we pulled up to a much fancier house. It still felt homely though. It was a white two-story house as well but it was much grander.

Mum knocked on the door and a little boy answered.

"Hello?" He said looking up at us with confused eyes. He looked about ten.

"Is your mum here?" Mum asked.

"Muuuuum." The kid called and a woman appeared behind him. She was beautiful but that wasn't what made me stare at her. Her hair was the exact same colour as mine. Her eyes were a chocolate the exact same shade as her hair.

"Trent. What have I told you about answering the door?" She scolded the boy.

"Sorry mum." He said and ran off.

"What's going on?" a bronze-haired man asked stepping up beside her.

"Marie." She answered him as she saw me.

"Isabella?" I asked. I was sure it was her. She nodded.

"Call me Bella. Come in. Can I get you anything?" Isabella asked as we followed her in.

"No thanks." Mum said as we took a seat on the couch.

"How can I help you?" She sighed. I think she already knew but she didn't want to talk about it. Of course she wouldn't. She had put me up for adoption hadn't she?

I noticed she leant into the man that had to be Edward. That meant he wasn't my father but I wasn't surprised. Dad was in jail. I didn't think she would stay with him.

"Is Trent my half brother?" I asked. I was a hundred percent certain he was but I didn't want to start with the hard questions yet.

"Yeah, Edward and I had Trent after we got married at the end of college." Bella said.

"Why is my biological father in jail?" I asked. I couldn't think of an easier question and I didn't want to. I wanted answers.

Bella frowned. I could tell she didn't want to answer this question.

"You're dad was drunk and he did something he shouldn't have." She replied thinking of her words carefully.

"You mean?..." I asked not wanting an answer.

"He was drunk and he raped me in the industrial district of Port Angeles." She said trying not to let any particular emotion sow through in her tone and expression.

It would explain why she gave me up. Who would want to keep a reminder of something like that? I felt so guilty. I had shown up here, a reminder of things she didn't want to be reminded of. I also felt so dirty. I wasn't some miracle like most children were to their mother I was unwanted.

"Don't feel guilty. It's okay. I was the one that decided to keep you. I was the one that decided to have an open adoption." She said with a slight frown.

"Why?" I asked confused.

"At the time I told myself I would be worse than him if I killed you but I know now that you were a miracle and I wanted you. I also had an open adoption because I wanted you to be able to come here whenever you wanted." She answered simply but with a lot of thought.

How could she think of me as a miracle? I was glad she had chosen an open adoption though. I was glad I got to meet her.

I didn't know what else to say to this woman... my mother. Everything was confusing.

"Some sixteenth birthday, huh?" Bella chuckled. I nodded. I had thought this afternoon would be simple. I would go get my license return home, get my presents and then have dinner with dad.

"Why did you have to choose a set of parent's where the father's name is the same as my biological father?" I asked exasperated. It was so annoying. I could refer to both my father's as Mark. Then again this was confusing enough.

"I didn't really have a choice. There aren't many people looking to adopt around here. I didn't like it much at first either." She said her expression her nose wrinkling.

I should have known. I knew it was hard for her to talk about my biological father. I had seen it in her expression, the way she bit her lip, when she had talked about him before.

"Did you want to meet some of your aunts and uncles?" Bella asked after a while, "Well they're not really I suppose. They're Edward's siblings but they're my family. I know they'd want to meet you."

"Sure, why not." I decided. I guess they were my aunts and uncles. Bella was married to Edward.

Edward hopped of the couch to go and call them. It wasn't long before there was a knock at the door.

"What is it Bella? You made out like it was a 911 emergency." A tinkling soprano voice spoke from the door.

"Not an emergency but very exciting. You're going to love this." Bella laughed as she led the guests into the house. There were four people.

"Alice, Jasper, Rosalie, Emmet this is Marie." She said pointing to each person as she said their name.

"Hi." I said with a small wave. Emmett was huge and quite scary.

"Marie." Emmett exclaimed and then came barrelling towards me picking me up in a bear hug. I screamed.

"Put the girl down." Rosalie scolded.

"I can't believe it's you." Emmett said doing as Rose said.

"It's me." I said. I didn't get what the big deal was. I didn't even know these people until just now but it was like they had known me my whole life.

"Don't worry about him. He's just very excitable. I swear Trent is more mature." Rosalie laughed. Emmett shot her an innocent look.

"It's nice to meet you." Jasper smiled a friendly smile and shook my hand.

"I can't believe it's been that long. Please tell me you haven't inherited you're mothers hate for shopping, we have to go shopping later." Alice said her eyes lighting up as she peered out from behind Jasper.

"Sorry. I don't really like shopping." I answered.

"Presents?" Alice asked pouting.

"Acceptable." I said appreciatively nodding my head.

"That's from your father." Alice said, "I remember trying to get your mum to accept presents at her baby shower. I thought I'd had trouble getting her to have a baby shower at all." Alice laughed.

"You had a baby shower?" I asked looking to Bella.

"Yeah, crazy Alice decided to have a baby shower for me. Of course she won in the end. I just gave in when it came to Trent. It wasn't that bad." She said mulling it over.

"You had a baby shower for me?" I asked questioning her sanity.

"Like I said, Alice is crazy." Bella said smiling at a memory.

"Why would you have a baby shower for me, the rape baby?" I asked. I was beginning to get used to the idea of what I was. There was no other way to really put my question in a perspective that they would get what I was asking.

"Don't ever think of yourself like that. We had a baby shower because you were a baby. That and Alice is crazy but mostly the whole baby thing. The only time I want to hear 'rape baby' is when you're annoying Alice." Bella said sternly. But I could see a smile in her eyes. I knew instinctively it came from the fact that I was annoying Alice.

I rolled my eyes. Sure her answer wasn't very serious but I knew she was meant it. Maybe not the whole 'Alice is crazy' thing, I hadn't been with her long enough yet, but the rest was right.

I saw Jasper glaring at Bella and Bella rolled her eyes.

"What wrong?" I asked.

"Jasper's very protective of Alice. I swear he's worse than Emmett over Rosalie. He doesn't like me calling Alice crazy or annoying her. He's an oversized guard dog." She laughed.

"Woof." Jasper barked sarcastically.

I noticed that Jasper and Alice were standing together and Rosalie and Emmett just a little bit apart from them. I saw a wedding ring on each of them.

"How are you guys all together. Aren't you brother and sister?" I asked.

"Only Jasper and Rosalie are biologically brother and sister. We were all adopted by Carlisle and Esme when we were young." It was Edward who spoke.

"When did you find out?" I asked looking at my mum (Janine) daring her to say something.

"My parents died when I was nine, I was adopted by Carlisle and Esme. I've always known." Edward answered.

"Our parent's died when we were five. Like Edward, We've always known." Rosalie answered for herself and Jasper.

"I was found in an abandoned home when I was thirteen. I have no memory of my parents or how I got there. Carlisle and Esme are the only parent's I've known." Alice said.

"My Mum died when I seven. My dad didn't want me. I was adopted by Carlisle and Esme." Emmett said, his usually happy demeanour gone.

"Guess no one here has a happy story, huh?" I sighed.

"Yeah we do, we get to be here with each other." Emmett said his happy demeanour back. Everyone laughed and no one disagreed.

"What are Uncle Emmett, Aunty Rose, Aunty Alice and Uncle Jasper doing here?" Trent asked as he came downstairs.

"We're here to see Marie." Emmett said picking up the little boy.

"Who's Marie?" Trent asked his eyes filled with childish curiosity.

"She's your sister." Emmett answered the little boy.

"Then how come I've never seen her before?" He asked.

"Because she lives with another mummy and daddy." Emmett answered still calm.

"Why?" He asked.

"You ask a lot of questions. Do you know what happens to little boys who ask too many questions?" Emmett asked. Trent didn't hear the not so subtle hint in Emmett's tone and so he didn't wriggle out of his uncle's arms in time to escape.

"Nooo…" The little boy screamed wriggling to escape Emmett's grasp as Emmett tickled him.

"Daddy. Emmett's tickling me." He cried out as he hugged his father's leg.

"Oh no. What are we going to do? Should we ask Aunt Rose to help us?" Edward whispered conspiratorially as he picked up Trent.

"Yes. Yes." Trent said eagerly as Emmett went to tickle the youngster again.

"Aunt Rose?" Edward said barely containing his laughter.

"Emmett." Rosalie said and Emmett returned to her side like a well-trained puppy dog.

Everyone laughed as Emmett placed a kiss on Rosalie's cheek.

"I want to know my story. Can you tell me?" I asked Bella as I looked around and saw a family I never knew I had. She took a deep sigh and then proceeded to tell me her story sparing no details.

**Author's Note**

I was origanally going to have this at the start and then have the rest of the story as Bella telling Marie what happened to her but this was easier. Hope you liked it!**  
**


	11. Chapter 11

**Author's Note**

So this is the original ending edited but I was thinking of writing an alternate ending because I don't really like this ending but I would REALLY like some suggestions because I kind of don't know what to write. If you could review with some ideas that would be really helpful.

**Chapter Eleven; Marie's POV**

"It's okay. You don't have to do this if you don't want." Mum said placing a hand on my shoulder as we pulled up to the next house. It was a small brick low set. It looked like a clone of all the other houses around it. You would never have guessed an ex-con lived here.

"I know. I want to though. I want to hear his side of the story. I want to know more about him. From Bella's story he doesn't sound like your typical criminal." I said before taking a deep breath and opening the door of the car. I walked up the path with mum following behind.

I knocked on the door and a young blonde woman answered the door. She was five months pregnant with a ring on her finger.

"Is Mark Ambrose here?" I asked.

"Mark its Marie." She called out behind her into the house. How did everyone know who I was? It had been sixteen years.

"I'm Lynette." She introduced herself.

"When did you meet Mark?" Janine asked.

"We met about five years ago, got married two years later and then another year after that we had Tyler. This is my second." She said patting her belly.

"Bella has a little boy named Trent. He's ten." I said trying to strike up conversation. Then I wondered if she knew about Bella and all that part of Mark's past but then she knew about me.

"Mark always wonders about Bella." Lynette smiled warmly.

"Marie." Mark exclaimed joining Lynette at the door with a two year old boy attached to his hip.

I don't know what I had expected but his appearance was kind of disappointing. He certainly looked like me so I knew how Lynette knew I was Marie. I don't know how I expected anything else or what I expected but he certainly wasn't it.

He just looked like an everyday businessman returned home from work. He had his long shirt sleeves rolled up, his tie off and his top button undone. His pants were a light creamy colour and his shirt a pale blue.

His icy blue eyes were exactly the same colour as mine. They were the same shape too. That must have been hard for Bella.

"Come in." He said and they moved from the door to let us in. We sat on comfortable chair in the living room.

"So how's Bella?" Mark asked eagerly, this earnt a look from his wife.

"You know I love only you." Mark assured her and gave her a quick kiss on the lips. She smiled.

"She's good. I told Lynette. Edward and Bella have Trent. He's ten." I said.

"That's great. She and Edward went together so well. He helped her when I couldn't." Mark said his tone layered with the weight of the memory.

"How did you two meet?" Mum asked breaking the ice.

"I just got out and we were having a celebration. Strictly soft drink on my part," He added his expression, "Lynette and I just got talking but I didn't have the nerve to tell her the reason we were celebrating. She was about to go and we swapped numbers when Scotty announced it to everyone." Mark groaned.

"Needless to say he was _very_ surprised when I called the next day." Lynette laughed.

"No offense but why?" I asked.

"None taken." Mark grinned.

"To tell you the truth I just didn't believe it but when I did I knew that one event didn't define Mark. I knew there was so much more to him." Lynette said looking at Mark. I could see the way she was looking at Mark and it was the way Edward looked at Bella, Emmett looked at Rose, Alice at Jasper and mum at dad. It was love.

"What do you work as?" I asked.

"Rather ironically, a teacher." He said.

"I didn't think you would be able to with a criminal record." I said thinking of some of the teachers at my school and wondering if they had criminal records.

"I'm a university teacher. I teach criminal law. I just want to make sure that people know exactly what trouble they can get into. I also do a few alcoholic anonymous meetings. I don't need to participate, just host, I could never touch another drop of alcohol again. Some think it's a bit over the top but I don't care about that." Mark said solemnly.

"I should've asked Bella if she drank." I laughed. Mark laughed too.

"I'm pretty sure she would. A good question would be about the nightmares. Do you know if she still has them?" He asked.

"Oh yeah, she mentioned nightmares but not in present tense. I don't think she would. She's got Edward." I said thinking about it.

"I wouldn't be sure. It can't have been easy for her when I got out." Mark said grimly.

"Stop beating yourself up, it's all in the past. You're in the present." Lynette said and she rubbed Mark's back.

"Shouldn't I be the one doing that to you?" Mark teased. She stopped massaging and he rubbed her back.

"Would you two like anything to eat or drink?" Lynette asked.

"No thank you." Mum and I said one after the other shaking our heads.

"You don't have to worry about me straining myself to get it. Mark would get it of course." She said sending a teasing look at her husband.

"It's okay." Mum insisted.

"Where are you going for school?" Mark asked.

"Port Angeles. I was surprised by how close you both are. It's amazing I haven't seen you around." I said.

"I've been in Sequim my whole life. I should probably try somewhere new but I can never bring myself to leave." He said sending wife a loving glance.

"Well I suppose I was brought up in Forks for the first six months of my life but that doesn't really count so I've been in Port Angeles my whole life." I shrugged. Mark mused over this thought.

"Where's the other Mark?" He asked.

"Home, I think. We just sort took an impromptu trip after school." I said.

"Impromptu trip?" Mark asked dubious.

"I was going to get my licence this afternoon but of course that requires a birth certificate and mum thought _now_ would be the best time to tell me I was adopted." I explained.

"I see, Happy Birthday by the way." He added.

"Bella seemed to know as soon as she answered the door. So did her father." I said pondering this phenomenon.

"You were born on her birthday. It's her birthday too." Mark explained.

"Oh, if I had of known I would've said something." I said wishing I had known.

"It's okay. She wasn't expecting you too. It's all about you. We haven't seen you in sixteen years. I didn't think I was ever going to see you." Mark admitted.

"I suppose. Why didn't you think you would get to see me?" I asked.

"Well... because of my history." He said sheepishly rubbing the back of his neck a habit it would appear we both had if we were nervous.

"It's not like you're a hardened criminal. Sure its pretty messed up and unforgivable but you regret it and you haven't done anything else." I shrugged mum rolled her eyes. I could tell she was worried though. I don't think she wanted me to have a blasé attitude when it came to criminals. Mark looked at me strangely with his head on a tilt.

"I'm glad you can see it that way. Not even I can sometimes, most of the time." He spoke.

"You're welcome." I smiled.

"If you want something to eat now's the time to admit it. I'm getting food from the kitchen. You may not be hungry but I am." Lynette said and with some effort she stood up.

When Mum and I didn't say anything she went into the kitchen was in the next room and made herself a snack.

"What was it like for you? I know Bella's story and I'm starting to know mine. What's yours?" I asked.

"It was like I was introduced to a whole new world. The world I knew was gone. Everything I thought I knew. All of sudden there was Isabella. The friend's I had were gone and replaced with strangers. I thought I knew them but I didn't. I didn't know myself. My parents were gone for a while too." He said looking for a way to describe his experience.

"But they came back?" I asked.

"Yes they did. It was actually after Bella talked to them. I was very surprised. It's still very awkward but I have Lynette and Tyler now. They're my family too." He said nuzzling the toddler on his lap. Lynette came back in with a plate of biscuits and dip.

"She's nice like that. What about your friends?" I asked.

"They're gone. We don't hate each other but we don't keep in contact. It was a few family friends that celebrated my release with me, the same ones that come to the wedding." He answered.

"We should actually get home for dinner. I'm sure you're waiting to have yours too. Thank you for letting us visit." Mum said suddenly and shook Mark's hand.

It felt too formal and even though I hadn't known this man was my father I wanted him to be now. He was still so upset about the past and some would say he deserved to be but I thought he deserved to have some happiness with his family. I gave him a hug and he looked startled but then he hugged back.

We left and the trip home was silent. Dad had dinner ready when he got home.

"How'd you go squirt?" Dad asked.

"Mum didn't take me to get my license. That's why we're so late." I said sheepishly. How to admit to dad that I knew I was adopted.

"I know." Dad said.

"Oh, yeah, it went well. They're nice. I have three step siblings. Well one isn't born yet but..." I started in a rush and dad laughed kissing me on the forehead as he set the bowls on the table for dinner.

"We'll get your license tomorrow." Mum promised as we ate and I just nodded.

I thought about Mark's words. You would think finding out you are adopted would be the end of the world but it was the creation of a new one, that I never knew existed.

"There we go. You stay safe on the roads." The cheery old lady at the licensing office called as we walked out. Mum had kept her word and I had gone for my license and passed.

There was a sense of freedom that came with having a license. The knowledge I could now drive, on the road. I could go anywhere I wanted, see whoever I wanted and do anything I wanted, nearly.

Mum wouldn't let me drive home. She muttered something about lessons and my father's less powerful car. She couldn't contain my excitement though on the trip home.

*** **Nine years later** ***

I drive along the winding roads. I wasn't looking for an escape, I didn't need one, but I found a sense of peace on the road. It was just me and the road. I would go where it led and it could lead me anywhere.

There was no one else to worry about. There was nowhere to be. It was a void that filled mine.

There was no one to see, no one to care, so I sped up and drove along the road faster enjoying the thrill of the speed. There was nothing like it, nothing that could equal it.

My phone rang but it didn't intrude on my bubble of peace, there was no knowledge that perhaps someone wanted me, needed me. It was just an electronic device making noise and I turned it off.

The music was a mind numbing noise in the background and I let it wash over me.

*** **Peter's POV** ***

I opened the door to the house which was unusually quiet. There was no noise. Usually if Marie was home she would have the radio turned right up and she would be singing in the kitchen. Or she would be on the phone. She didn't do quiet. I had come to learn this the hard way over our three year marriage.

I searched the house finishing in the bathroom. She wasn't there. I found a package torn open on the floor. It was a pregnancy test. I searched for the results. They were positive. Had she gone to tell her parents?

I called her phone and I got no answer. I checked the garage, something I should've done first up, and her car was gone. She had run away because she was pregnant? I dropped to the floor of the garage. How had things gone so wrong? I didn't think she would do this. It should be a happy thing, not stressful.

The phone rang and I emerged from the depths of my misery to answer it.

"Hello."

"Hey, it's Janine here. Is Marie there?" She asked.

"No. She isn't. She's gone. Her car's gone." I said stiffly.

"Oh. Is anything wrong?" She asked.

"She's pregnant." I answered curtly.

There was silence on the other end. I wished I knew what Janine was thinking. I had a feeling she knew why Maire would run away.

"What is it?" I asked.

"She's adopted. She probably doesn't see a baby as being a good thing. All she's ever known is confusion. She hides it well. I don't think she knows herself but it's there. She doesn't know who her true family is and it hurts. She probably doesn't want that for her baby." Janine answered.

"Do you think she would... get rid of it?" I asked hesitantly.

"I don't think she would but I don't know what she's thinking right now. She won't want to put it up for adoption if my assumptions are correct but that only leaves two other options, both of which she won't like. Just give her time." Janine said calmly.

'Okay." I sighed.

How could she say that so calmly? That wasn't reassuring. What if she never wanted to see me again? I loved her and I wanted her back. I wanted to think this through together.

I was lying in bed still in my clothes just looking at my ceiling when my phone rang. It was two in the morning so I didn't know what to think when I answered.

"Hello."

"Hey, Peter." She said meekly.

"Marie. Please come back." I said immediately. I was just so worried about her.

"I think I will. I just had a lot on my mind when I found out. Did you see the bathroom?" She asked.

"Yeah, it's okay. Come back. You can tell me what's on your mind and we can talk." I suggested.

"Okay." She agreed.

"Are you at a hotel?" I asked.

"Yeah." Came her answer.

"Good. I miss you." I said.

"I miss you too." She said.

"Bye."

"Bye."

***** ****The End**** *****


End file.
